


Dreaming of Tearing you Apart

by Simurgh



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Bonding, M/M, Pack Feels, Shapeshifting, Werewolf Danny, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-02-24
Packaged: 2019-03-08 16:17:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 26,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13461900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Simurgh/pseuds/Simurgh
Summary: Oahu is hit by a sudden outbreak of Werewolves gone feral, and it has everyone on edgeBeing a Wolf in this suspicious climate is hard enough, but dealing with a manic partner and looking after two rattled young pack members is enough to keep Danny ill at ease.He really doesn't need the sudden blackouts on top of everything else.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 1) This story is finished and will not be abandoned. The missing chapters only have to pass through their last edits and before they will be uploaded as well.
> 
> 2) Unfortunately there's not Charlie in this story. When I first started writing it he didn't have a big role in the show and felt severely underdeveloped to me - and this was not the fic for me to develope him more.  
> After the show gave him a bit more room I tried adding him in, but it just didn't feel right at this point.  
> So, sadly, no Charlie here.

Danny is not happy this morning. He knows, some people - Steve, Rachel, his mum, Sang Min, Kamekona, the post office guy, the bakery person, whatever - would tell you that he is never a happy person. But that's a lie. He might not be the flowers everywhere, sunshine and rainbow kind of lunatic, but that doesn't mean he is an unhappy person.

Not at all.

But on this morning he's definitely unhappy.

His neighbors made a ruckus the night before, so he fell asleep in the wee hours of the morning and consequently overslept. Due to said oversleeping he had to rush through his morning routine and had no time for coffee, or for his normal pick me up in case of unhappiness, coco puffs. Besides that, the traffic is horrible, the weather is terrible and there have been too many people bumping in to him.

So no, Detective Danny Williams is definitely not a happy person right now.

His mood doesn't improve when he enters the office and Mr McGarrett is nowhere to be seen.

Chin and Kono on the other hand are standing at the table.

Unfortunately, their frowns indicate that whatever it is that they're discussing is not going to make him feel any happier.

"Anyone get hurt?"

"Unfortunately. They had to shoot him to get him off the cashier. It's still not sure whether or not he's going to make it."

"Damn..."

Danny steps up to them. "A new case?"

"Not for us." Chin turns around. "There's been another case of Feral Behavior though."

Danny clenches his jaw and looks away. "That's what, the fourth one now?"

Kono nods. "Yeah."

"Do they know anything more?"

"Not that I have heard of."

Danny opens his mouth to ask something else, but the glass doors swing open and Steve strides in. "Get your stuff, Governor just called - we have a new case."

 

 

They're standing over the dead body of a drug pusher the HPD has had their eyes on for a while now. To be honest, Danny's not quite sure why Five-0 got the lead on this case, but he's not going to complain. Well, he is, loudly and at lengths, but he's not going to complain to the Governor. He's not that dumb.

They're standing in an alley, connecting two semi busy streets. At night it's probably mostly deserted with all the surrounding shops closed down for the night.

In daylight though they're attracting quite a few onlookers, held back only through the yellow police lien and - more importantly - the officers keeping them back.

"Alright, what've we got?"

Kono looks at her notes. "Nick Burgess, age 34, working at Docksen and Son's mechanic shop. HPD suspected him of distributing drugs, but so far they haven't been able to find any evidence. They've requested a wiretap a few days ago, but nothing so far."

"Cause of death?"

At this Noelani, who's been examining the body, pushes the body up a bit so that they could see the upper part of his back.

"I obviously can't say anything for sure before the autopsy, but it looks like he died due to a gunshot wound. It hit a lung so he couldn't call for help."

Steve nods and crouches down in front of the victim, rifling through his pockets.

Danny looks the man over. He's wearing a sports coat over a shirt, well cut jeans and leather shoes. The watch on his wrist is too bit to look nice, but it rather efficiently screams 'money'.

"Wallet's still here and nothing seems to be missing."

He throws the keys he finds on the victim at Danny. "We'll take a look and see what we can find. Chin, Kono, dig into his background and look into everything HPD has on this guy. "

Danny nods, but stays where he is. Steve stops after a few steps, eyebrows raised.

"Danny? You coming?"

"Just wait a sec will you?"

Steve raises an eyebrow but does as he's told for once. Danny looks around. It's a pretty average place. Not too dirty, but neither the strange cleanliness of expensive places. There are people milling around, but it's not extremely crowded.

Danny breathes in deeply, tries to figure out the scents, to filter out important from unimportant. He registers the tang of salt and seaweed, but dismisses it immediately, as it's always everywhere on this island. There's sunblock, flowers, the smell of tar and perfumes.

There's also a strange overly sweet and acidic smell he can't place. He crouches down to follow the smell

Burgess.

He picks up one of his hands and smells it.

"What is it? You got something?"

Danny frowns. "Not sure yet. There's some kind of residue on his hands, but I'm not sure what it is."

"We'll have the lab look into it."

Danny nods and gets up, his knee protesting a bit at the movement.

Now that he's dialling down his sense of smell, other impressions filter back into his awareness. The uneasy whisper of the people around him, the shuffling of some, the distrustful gazes people throw at him, civilians and officers alike.

He clenches his fists and shoulders his way past Steve.

"You coming or what?"

 

 

The way to Burgess' place is silent. Steve opens his mouth a few times, but it takes him a while to actually voice what he's got on his mind.

"You alright?"

Danny glares at him. "Yes of course I'm alright, why wouldn't I be?"

Steve tilts his head from side to side. "Well, you seem a little bit high strung."

"I'll tell you why I seem high strung, Steven. I am high strung because I am tired and because I have not only a maniac as a partner, but as it appears, also maniacs as neighbors. I am high strung because I have yet to have a decent cup of coffee today. That's way I'm high strung."

"So it's got nothing to do with the way the people acted back there?"

Danny raises his eyebrow. "How they acted? You mean, their morbid fascination with someone who's been killed in the street? Well, Steven, while I might not like that kind of behavior I do have a few years of detective work under my belt, so believe it or not, I have encountered this before. "

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

"No I don't know what you mean. Also, considering how delusional you usually are I don't think I even want to know what it is you think you saw."

Steve ignores him. Of course he does. "Their treatment of you."

"What kind of treatment? I didn't interact with anyone enough to have them treat me in any kind of way.

"The way they looked at you once you showed that you're a Lycan. The way they talked and acted."

"So, some people are prejudiced assholes. I am touched, truly, I am deeply touched by your concern, but I have encountered this kind of behavior my whole life. It sucks, yes, but I can't get mopey over every dickhead I encounter."

Steve's quiet for a moment.

"I know you can't. But this is different, isn't it?"

Danny stays quiet.

"There are dickheads, yes, but now it's not just dickheads. It's way more people than normal."

Danny looks outside at the landscape hurrying past the window.

"It's not."

"It is. And we both know-"

"Shut up, Steve, just shut up."

And he does.

At least for now. But Danny knows his partner and he's pretty sure that this is not over yet.

Scratch that, he's one hundred percent sure. Steve's like a dog with a bone. Once he's got something in mind he's not letting go, can barely get his jaws to open up again.

So no, he is not going to let this one go.

 

Burgess' place is small and in dire need of a new coat of paint. Not at all what Danny expected considering the wad of cash he had in his wallet and the watch on his wrist.

He pulls out the keys and opens up the door. The inside is surprisingly clean.

They search the place but can't find anything connecting him to either a potential attacker, or any kind of illegal activities.

They do find a receipt of a pharmacy behind the emptied out bin, but nothing else.

Danny breathes in again, but even with his nose he doesn't find anything.

He finds suspiciously little.

"Something's not right here."

"What do you mean?"

"A house no matter how clean it's kept, always smells of something. Soap, last night's meal, anything."

"This place doesn't?"

"It smells as if no one's lived here. No food smell, no coffee, no toothpaste. Nothing." He blinks. "I don't even smell Burgess."

"Then I'd say you're right. There's definitely something not right here."

"Question is, babe, is this not his place and he was carrying the keys to this apartment just to be able to keep up a facade, or is it actually his place and someone managed to go through it and clean it up so thoroughly that there's no trace of smell left?"

"You know of anything that would be able to do that?"

Danny shakes his head. "Not without leaving one hell of a smell of its own. Bleach could erase, vinegar overshadow most smells, but they've got their own scent. There's nothing of the sort here."

"Alright. We'll have someone go over the place with a fine toothed comb, see if there's something we missed and try to find out if there's a possible other place for Burgess to be staying at."

 

 

They head back to headquarters and drop off the receipt in the lab on their way back, although they're holding little hope that the medicine he bought will hold any significance, or that there will be any other useful information on there.

They're just about to leave, when Eric calls out.

"Hey, Uncle D, wait a sec."

Danny rolls his eyes and turns back.

"What have I told you about calling me that?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know, just, sorry." He doesn't say anything else, just looks past Danny at Steve.

After a moment he shuffles around. "Sorry, Steve, could you maybe give us a sec?"

"Uh, yeah, sure." Danny doesn't turn around, but he can basically see the confused face by the tone alone. "I'll wait in the car. D."

Eric grins and Danny heaves a long suffering sigh. He's surrounded by idiots.

When the door closes behind Steve he turns back to his nephew.

"Alright, what was that all about?"

Eric chews on his lips and Danny's suddenly a lot more concerned about what's going on.

"Eric? You alright?"

"I..." He sighs. "Yeah no, not really. I know you're busy, but do you think we could... I don't know, get together tonight? Or tomorrow? Or something? Get Gracie and eat dinner, watch a movie, a sleepover?"

Danny's chest clenches and he pulls Eric against himself for a short moment, squeezing him.

"Been a while since our last pack night, hasn't it?"

Eric nods and hugs Danny back, his grip bordering on too tight, before letting go.

Danny has to keep in mind to have him over more often until this situation is resolved. It's always hard when people act suspicious of them simply because of what they are, but it's worse now. And it's made even worse by not having their whole family pack around to give them stability and safety. Eric's come a long way from home and while Danny knows it's because of Hawaii and the opportunity here, he also knows that part of the reason he came was that his uncle was here. Their relationship has never been simple, but it's always been a close.

And Eric is still so very young. It's got to hit him even worse.

"Yeah, we'll do a pack night. I'll see that I can get off work at a reasonable hour."

"What about Gracie? Isn't she at Rachel's?"

Danny pulls a face. "Yeah, she is. But I'll see if she can come over for the night."

Eric nods. "Thanks, Uncle D."

Danny nods and pads him on the shoulder before turning and heading back to the car.

 

This time Steve doesn't wait with his ambush. The moment Danny's buckled in he fires away.

"What was that about?"

"Has anyone ever told you that you are way too curious about other people's business?"

Steve snorts. "You know, I might consider it if it wasn't you who's complaining."

Danny just hums and looks out of the window.

"So?"

"So what?"

"What was it about? Eric's not usually shy about talking in front of others."

"No he's not, which is why I respect that he doesn't want anyone else knowing what it is he wanted to talk about and will continue not telling you about it."

Steve hums, before nodding. "Alright, fair enough."

Danny blinks. "That's it?"

"Of course, what did you expect?"

"I expected you to keep on prodding and poking."

"I'm not unreasonable."

Now it's Danny's turn to snort.

"I'm not! And your answer was very reasonable and I respect Eric's wish."

Danny squints at him suspiciously. "So if it'd been something about me, you would have kept prodding?"

Steve grins. "Of course!"

 

#

 

Rachel is letting him have Grace for the night. Danny's not sure if it's actually her attempt at being civil or if it's more for Gracie's sake. He really hopes it's her attempt at being civil, because if he thinks about his little girl experiencing the same behavior that he has to endure, he's going to go feral himself.

Though considering her age it's probably even worse for her.

And there goes his calm.

Danny's gripping the countertop with too much strength. His knuckles turn white and he can feel his claws shifting. Moments before he actually does a shift and let them out - and in the process scratch the countertop rather badly - he manages to take a few deep breaths.

Yes, he's pissed off and he's resolved to keep an eye on it, but tonight's not about that. On the contrary, it's about taking a step back from all the stress and refuel in the circle of what little pack they have on this island.

He grabs the popcorn he'd originally come to the kitchen for and goes back out into the living room.

The space between the couch and the TV is covered by soft blankets and pillows and some of Grace's old squishy animals that she still sometimes likes to get out for comfort, even though she has Danny promise not to tell anyone.

If she pulled them out in front of Eric - not that Eric's ever going to make fun of her for it - she must be really rattled.

Deep breath.

He lowers himself into the pack pile, handing over the popcorn.

"Alright, what are we watching?"

 

Danny drops off Grace at school the next day. She's a lot calmer than she was before and he resolves to make a pack night at least once every week she's with him.

It won't just help both her and Eric. Danny feels more settled as well.

He hopes to hell that they find out whatever's going on soon, though. The faster this is over, the better for every Wolf.

 

#

 

Three days later and they've still not made any headway on the Burgess murder. It's frustrating but that's police work for you. It doesn't always pen out and even if it does, it's not always easily wrapped up. Sometimes it takes a while.

In the meantime Danny's mood plummets again.

He's alone in his office and for that he's insanely grateful. It's all over the news. Yet another case. A paramedic went feral on a call. Both he and the elderly woman he came to treat are dead. The second EMT is still in the hospital, no news on her condition.

He wants to call Grace, wants to call Eric, see how they're dealing, but he can't, not right now, because right now he isn't calm, right now he can't give them any kind of stability, any kind of reassurance.

He's too unstable himself. He wants to rip someone apart, wants to think there's something that causes this, something he can take on, something he can fix.

Instead he's left to deal with his own anger and helplessness while trying to be there for the two young pack members who've gathered around him.

He's not sure he's able to do this.

 

There's a soft knock on the glass door. His head is heavy and it takes him way longer than it should to lift it. He expected to see Chin, but it's Steve who's standing outside the door, not barging in, waiting for Danny to allow him inside.

Maybe he does have a sense of self-preservation. Entering a Wolf's territory uninvited is never a wise decision, but especially not if they're agitated.

Then again, Steve's never cared about that and the idea of him having any kind of self-preservation is more than ridiculous.

So it's something else.

Danny waves him in and Steve strides in, sitting down heavily on the couch

"We're taking over the case."

Danny blinks. Maybe he's missed something.

"I'm sorry, what? I think you might have forgotten to voice the other half of that sentence."

Steve just stares out through the window panes.

"Hey, Mr thousand-yard-stare, someone in there? What case?"

Steve squirms. Steve almost never squirms.

Danny's not sure whether his curiosity or his dread is stronger right now.

"Steven. What. Case."

Steve sighs, as if it's Danny who's difficult, as if Danny is the one that makes everything harder, when he's asking a very simple question that, considering that he is actually a detective and thus will be working on whatever case Steve has decided they take over, is one that really needs to be answered before any kind of detecting can proceed.

"The cases of Feral Behavior."

He doesn't look over, keeps staring through the windows. When Danny doesn't react he glances at him, before snapping his gaze back again. Danny's not really sure what his face looks right now. It feels pretty blank, if he's honest. But who knows what Steve reads into it.

"There's something wrong about what's going on, that's not normal. And it doesn't look like HPD is getting any headway and the Burgess case is at a standstill and this case really needs to be-"

"Okay."

"-dealt with... What?"

Now Steve looks at him, turns even and stares straight at him.

"I said okay."

Steve blinks. It's like watching the loading screen on a Windows.

"What? No, no rant about... I don't know, overstepping or forcing myself on cases or-"

"No. No ranting." Now it's Danny who looks away. "Thanks."

There's silence for a moment. Then, in a soft voice that Steve very rarely uses:

"You're welcome, Danno."

 

They're gathered around the tech table. "Alright, what have we got so far?"

Chin starts pulling up reports.

"Six cases of Feral Behavior over the last two months. So far six people dead, one permanently injured, five still in the hospital. The wolves who've gone feral are Jim Ishihara, 25 works as a fireman." He pulls up a picture of a young man, tan skin, black hair artfully tousled and a big smile on his face, another picture of a slim black Wolf next to it. "His brother's managed to take him down before he could hurt anyone."

Chin swipes the pictures of Ishihara, both in human as well as Wolf form to the side, pulling up a new one. A woman, pale, long brown curls, round face with stylish glasses. A sturdy, sand colored Wolf on another picture. "Second case, Mirela Hopkins, 34, mother of two little boys. Works as an emergency dispatcher. Hurt two co-workers before she got shot. One of them lost an eye. She's still in the hospital."

Danny is glad that there are no photographs of the kids.

Another set of pictures, this one of a smiling young woman, darker skin, her thick black hair cut short and she's showing off some kind of certificate. Her Wolf form is a light brown with dark fur covering her back. "Third case, Leah Regensberg, 26, works in the ER. Killed two people, hurt five more before they were able to take her down."

More pictures. Danny knows that there have been several cases, but seeing them being pulled up, one after another, makes him nauseous.

These pictures show a man with dark, graying hair and a neatly trimmed beard. His Wolf is big and sturdy, fur almost white, but light and dark gray patches covering his head and back. "Fourth case, Kealoha Motooka, 46, works as a teacher. Got a girl in Kukui High School. Went feral during grocery shopping and assaulted a cashier. Police had to shoot him to get him to let go of the victim. He died in the hospital. The cashier is in a coma."

Danny closes his eyes and swallows. Tries not to think of that girl and what she's just lost. He opens his eyes again and glances at Steve. His jaw is set. He's probably thinking about the same thing - only he doesn't need to imagine it, he can just draw from memory.

Danny shifts until his shoulder presses against Steve's arm.

Chin pulls up another set. A man with white hair, face wrinkled, smirking at the camera. His Wolf is slim, brown and black fur streaked with white. "Fifth case, Officer Rafael Velasco, 71, attacked his gardener. Daughter and son-in-law shifted and managed to get him down."

"The gardener?" Danny looks at Steve who's voiced the question he didn't dare to ask himself.

"Got lucky, only minor injuries." He's not quite able to suppress the sigh of relief.

Kono takes over from Chin, using her tablet instead of the table. "Then today, sixth case." She pulls up the picture of a man, tan skin, dark hair pulled back into a bun. "EMTs were called in after an 82 year old woman, Harriet Brighton, got injured after she fell down. They arrived and started treating her, when one of the EMTs, Joshua Naeole, 31, went feral. He killed the woman and put his colleague in the hospital. Naeole is dead, his colleague's still in critical condition."

Danny lets out a breath, his gut churning.

Steve nods, his face determined. "Alright. Age, gender, ethnicity, everything's different. We need to find out what these people have in common, see what might have caused this.

"Lou, talk with the hospitals and ME's, see if there's anything in their financial and medical history that could lead to a break. Jerry, dig into their backgrounds. Chin, Kono, you and Danny and I are going to talk to the friends and families of the people gone feral."

 

#

 

"We're very sorry for your loss."

Danny looks at the stiff posture of Mrs Regensburg, at the slumped and defeated look of her husband. How they're not touching, there's a hand width between them.

She sniffs.

"I'm sure you are."

Danny suppresses a sigh. He can't blame her, she's just lost her daughter and she can't even mourn her like anyone would, because the public is ripping her apart, is making her out to be some animal, some mad monster.

She's just a young woman who wanted to help people. Danny swears they're going to find out what's going on and they're going to put an end to it. There's not going to be another Leah, and young Wolves like Grace and Eric will not be regarded with distrust and hate anymore.

They're Wolves, but they are no mindless monsters. They're not the stuff of nightmares any more than any other person.

Teeth are no more deadly than a knife or a bullet.

"Can you tell us if there was anything unusual in the days before Leah's break?"

She laughs, a hollow, empty sound.

"What, you mean like, was she sleeping outside, howling at the moon, ripping apart the neighbor's rabbits?"

Danny suppresses another sigh and sits down next to Steve. He looks straight at Mrs Regensburg and when she turns to look at him he shifts. It's just a partial shift, just enough to elongate his teeth, to make his brows and beard bushier, to make his ears become slightly pointier and his nose turn gray-ish.

He snaps his shift back and looks back at her. "Trust me, that is not what we are thinking."

She closes her eyes for a moment, breathing in. She loses a bit of her rigid air, slumping a bit.

"I'm sorry."

Steve nods. "Don't worry about it, we understand."

She smiles sadly. "No you don't." There's no bite in her words this time.

She's not wrong.

"There wasn't anything really. She was a bit stressed, but she's been doing a lot of long shifts recently."

"Did she always get stressed like that?"

"Well... Leah's..." She swallows. "...was a very calm person. It's not easy to rile her. When she's stressed she becomes a bit quieter, talks mostly in one word sentences. She doesn't usually get snappish like she did this time, but, with everything that's been going on, how could anyone blame her?"

 

#

 

"So everyone's saying the same thing. In the days leading up to the break they all became more and more aggressive, but other than that, nothing out of the ordinary."

"Vics have nothing in common so far. Not the same neighborhood, no payments at the same bars or bookshops or anything. Five of the six vics are working in some kind of first responder job, but one's a teacher."

"Anything in their medical history?"

"Mirela Hopkins was treated for an underactive thyroid. Leah Regensberg was taking hormones and Motooka had recently gotten a tetanus shot. The tox scan from the last two is still standing out, but the four others had no other medication but the state provided shift-suppressors."

"Same is probably going to come back for the other two."

"That's not all, though." Chin pulls up several reports, showing a chemical composition. "There have been traces of Atropine in their systems." He looks down at the tech table and pulls up some kind of report. "It can be found in plants like Belladonna or Devil's Trumpet. It can be poisonous but apparently it's got quite a lot of medical uses as well. It can for example be used to reduce muscle spasms or secretion during surgeries. It can also be used as an antidote or to counter act a too slow heartbeat.

"ME's not sure what to make of it or how it got into their system. But so far that and the fact that they all went feral is the only thing connecting all four of our victims."

Jerry comes over with quick steps, his gaze fixed on the tablet in his hand.

"Guys, guys, I think I got something. Look at this."

He pulls up a map. Several places are littered with red spots.

Steve cocks his head and frowns at the display.

"What're we looking at here?"

"You are looking at something seriously disturbing."

Steve raises his eyebrows at him. As do Danny and Chin and Kono. Lou just shakes his head.

Jerry looks up at them, blinks. "Alright, alright. I looked into what's going on here and tried to find out if it had happened before. Thought we couldn't rule out that there was something organized or something natural behind it."

Danny frowns and looks back at the map.

"So you're saying that it's happened before, at those places?"

Jerry nods and clicks. All but one town disappear.

"Furness, Colorado, 2004. Four people go feral, killing others. Two are shot, one disappears afterward, one kills himself. Cause was never found. Stopped as suddenly as it started." He clicks again. Another cluster of red dots appears. "Croton Creek, Utah, 2009. Three Ferals, two dead." Click. "Wolford, Idaho, 2012. Six going feral, four dead." Click. "Fairview, Nevada, 2015. Four Ferals, one killed." Click. "And here we are. Ohau, Hawaii, 2017. Six incidents,three dead."

They stare at the map. No one has anything to say, not even Danny.

A moment passes, before Kono asks in a quiet voice: "How hasn't anyone noticed this before?"

"This is the first time it's happened in a bigger city. More media attention for one, and..." Jerry glances at Danny, who pinches the bridge of his nose.

"And more prejudice in smaller towns. No one is surprised when Wolves go feral, because that's just what we do, isn't it?"

Steve puts a hand on his shoulder, still staring at the red dots on the map. "So we've got a serial killer."

"Looks likely."

Steve closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. "Well done, Jerry."

Jerry nods. "Thanks. Kinda wish this wasn't what I found though."

"Yeah. But it's going to help us to keep it from happening anywhere after Ohau."

 

They end the day late and without any real results. It's frustrating and it's disappointing and it's making Danny's skin itch.

He's banging around at home, not caring about the ruckus he's making. It's a good thing Grace is not there or she would lecture him.

God he wishes Grace was there.

Danny tries to go to bed early hoping that he'll calm down if he gets enough sleep for once. But no matter what he tries, he just keeps tossing and turning.

 

The next morning Danny is anything but well rested. Just another wonderful start for work. The only upside is that he's up so early that he has no problem getting his coffee. The downside is that somehow he still gets neither malasadas nor Coco Puffs.

He's at the office for about an hour before the rest comes in. Rationally he knows that they're not actually late. At least not any later than the usual island time lateness. He knows that he came to headquarters way too early, but it doesn't change that it pisses him off.

He glares at them as they come in but stays in his office.

Steve comes over a while later.

"Hey, Danny, you alright?"

Danny snorts.

"Why wouldn't I be, everything is peachy."

Steve frowns, but Danny ignores him, tries to ignore the itch under his skin.

"Besides the fact that you look like shit you've also been glaring daggers at us ever since we came in."

"Well, please do excuse me, but there is a case to work. A case I thought you cared about since you decided we take it on." He turns back to his desk and growls. "Though I guess it's not a big surprise that I'm the only one who does actually care."

"What the hell, Danny? Of course we care about the case! We've been working it all day yesterday, trying to find any kind of break and trust me, we will not do any less today. But as you so often remind me, it's no use working without sleep, because then you only miss things that you'd have seen otherwise."

Danny keeps staring at the desk in front of him. Steve is right, of course he is right and Danny has known this is exactly what's going on since they all came in, but something inside of him keeps growling and roaring, and he just wants to yell at Steve.

He doesn't

It takes a lot of effort, but he doesn't yell at him.

Danny takes a deep breath, holds it for a moment before releasing it. Twice more and he feels the itch recede.

He closes his eyes and runs his hands over his face.

"I'm sorry, Steve, I know that you care about this case. I'm just..."

Steve comes around the desk, leaning against it next to Danny.

"Hey, I know. It's alright."

He squeezes Danny's shoulder and he relaxes. Just slightly, just a bit. But it feels like he can breathe again.

 

Kono pokes her head through the door and, after eying Danny for a second, says: "Hey, brah, I got something!"

Danny jumps out of his chair and is out of the door before Steve's even crossed the room.

"I'm not sure it's actually something relevant, but remember our friend Burgess? You said that he had a sweet substance on his hands. Turns out it's from a flower called Angel's Trumpet. Highly poisonous - and you can win Atropine from it."

Danny stares at her for a second before turning to Chin, so fast he almost trips over his own feet. "Pull up anything we have on the Burgess' murder."

It takes them another two hours, but finally they've got something.

Over the last two weeks Burgess called three numbers repeatedly. One belongs to his girlfriend Stacy Henshaw, who they've already spoken to during their previous investigation. Though they hadn't officially lived together it had been weeks since Burgess' had last slept at home instead of her place.

The second is one of his friends. He's been under police observation and a call to Duke tells them that he's apparently been frustratingly unsuspicious.

The last number is the landline of a Mrs Jannat Golyan - who just so happens to own the pharmacy to which they found the receipt at Burgess' place.

Danny might be wrong, but he doesn't think it's common to call your pharmacist at home several times a month.

It's not much, it may even be nothing, but Danny will take it.

For once he doesn't complain about Steve's very special brand of driving, just grips the handle and stares through the windshield.

Outside the house they gather around Steve, eyeing the pretty white bungalow with suspicious gazes.

"Chin, Kono, you take the front, we'll go around."

Steve and Danny carefully make their way around the house. Unfortunately they notice that there's not just one back door, but two.

"Who the hell needs three doors?" It's not like it's an overly huge house either.

Steve just rolls his eyes and motions for Danny to stay at the door while he moves further around until he's at the lanai.

"We're in position."

The doorbell rings and they hear Chin, both through their comms and quieter from in front of the house. "Five-0. Mrs Golyan, we need to talk to you."

There's nothing for a moment, but then Chin starts talking to someone. A moment later Danny can see movement through one of the windows and the side door opens slowly. A moment later the person on the other side throws it open.

A fragrant, familiar smell, sticky sweet, hits Danny. He can't suppress the growl that rips out of his throat, as he starts running after the person.

"Stop! Five-0!"

They don't stop, not that it comes as any surprise.

Still, Danny would love it if their perps decided to listen to them. Just once. It would be wonderful.

Danny has almost reached them, when they snap around. A split second before he barrels into the man he sees the gleam of a knife. He twists around, tries to dodge it, but can't avert it completely.

He doesn't feel it, but he can see the blood seeping through his sleeve.

Danny should back off. He should use the advantage of having a gun. Should stay away from the reach of the blade.

But he doesn't.

Instead he attacks.

Despite the lucky hit he got in, the man isn't skilled in any kind of way. It usually wouldn't take much to take him down, but he's desperate and what he lacks in finesse he makes up for by pure force, getting in more hits and even manages to cut him twice more with the knife. But between the training from his cop days, the training Steve has forced onto him and his sheer anger, even the perps bigger size and muscle mass don't get him out of getting subdued.

Steve reaches him, looking at the suspect on the ground and then at Danny.

Then at the cut on his arm. And his upper thigh.

"What the hell, Danny?"

"What the hell what, Steven?"

"What was that?"

"That was me following a suspect that was trying to evade us. What's your problem?"

Steve's expression darkens and Danny is half convinced he can hear his teeth grinding together.

"My problem, Danny, is that you got knifed and that that's probably the best outcome out of such a reckless action."

"Reckless action? Do you really want to lecture me on reckless action? That's really rich."

"So you admit that this is the kind of behavior you'd ream me for if I would do it?"

Danny glares at him. When the suspect moves he kneels more fully on him.

It's probably constricting his lung capacity, but he really doesn't care right now.

"So you're allowed to go all Rambo, but then you turn around and get pissed at me if I do it just once? You're a damn hypocrite."

"For one, I was trained to go 'all Rambo'. For another, Danny, this isn't just you going Rambo, this is you being reckless and not caring what's happening."

He backs of, his posture loosening.

"Go home, Danny, get those cuts looked at and calm the hell down. When you're ready to think like a rational being, then get back into the office." He looks straight at Danny, not a trace of amusement on his face. "Before that I don't want to see you there."

Danny gets up and shoves Steve in the chest, his other hand clenched tightly.

"You know what? Fuck you, McGarrett." There's a voice in the back of Danny's head, yelling at him to stop. He doesn't. He can't. "You only care about whatever the hell concerns you. To hell with anyone else's thoughts, right? As long as you get your revenge, as long as everyone obeys whatever the hell it is you want to do, everything is fine. You don't even know what it means to be in a team that doesn't jump at your every command."

Steve's mouth is pressed together in a thin line, but he just grabs the suspect and hauls him up and towards the cars.

"Yeah, right, and now you run. You always run."

There's no response and Danny shoulders past Steve and the suspect, past Chin and Kono, who stare at him with wide eyes, until he's in the car. He doesn't look back as he peels away from the curb with squealing tires, barely glancing at the rest of the traffic.

 

 

~~*~~


	2. Chapter 2

 

Steve watches Danny's car peel off and tries to ignore the way that something appears to be constricting his chest, making his throat tight.

He knows Danny is under an immense amount of stress, knows what kind of a toll this whole situation takes on their whole Werewolf population. Knows how downcast Eric is, how Grace is slower to smile and a lot quicker to frown.

He knows that he can't blame Danny, knows that he'd never say something like this if he wasn't in this situation. But it doesn't make it hurt any less.

"Steve?"

Kono's soft voice pulls him out of his head.

"I'm alright."

She smiles and squeezes his shoulder, but doesn't voice the fact that he's clearly not.

No use rubbing it in, probably.

 

#

 

The man who tried to run from them and, more importantly, took his knife to Danny, turns out to be Ms Golyans nephew. Kai Golyan has been working part time at her pharmacy for years, long enough to have just as many contacts there as she has and considerable knowledge about drugs and medicine, even if he doesn't have the degree to go along with it.

That's not the only interesting thing about him, though. Another surprising detail is the name of his current girlfriend.

Stacy Henshaw.

 

 

"I really don't know what to tell you, Sir."

Steve leans against his desk, looking over the woman sitting in his visitor's chair. Her hair is in a messy bun and she's got some chalk on her sleeve, having come over right after work when she got Kono's call.

Her voice is soft, almost shy if not for the way she doesn't hesitate to hold Steve's gaze, her chin lifting up.

"Well, for a start you could tell me about your boyfriends. Did they know about each other?"

She sighs, slumping back in the chair, hand coming up to scrub at her face.

"They knew each other, but they didn't exactly know that I was involved with both of them. I mean..." she frowns, looking to the side. "I told Kai that I didn't want to be official or anything because my ex was a jealous bastard, but I never told him about Nick specifically."

"And you never thought he might figure it out?"

Ms Henshaw shrugs. "I'll be honest here. Kai's not exactly the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree. And I've got separate phones and kept pretty good track of when I was seeing whom."

Steve cocks his head, eyeing her for a moment. He does appreciate that she doesn't try to act like the wronged party and that she's coming right out with the truth.

Though considering that she was involved with both of them and didn't tell them does put a damper on that appearance of honesty.

"Look." She sits up straighter again. "I know that you probably don't have the highest opinion of me. I don't blame you for that, but truthfully I don't much care about it either. That doesn't change the fact that I don't think I can help you out here."

"Maybe not. But maybe you know some things that can help us, even if you don't think they do." He uncrosses his arms and gives her a smile. No use alienating her. "You said the two of them knew each other?"

She nods. "That's actually how I met Nick. I've been friends with Kai's aunt for several years now, and met him a few times since then. When I came to Ohau he invited me to meet his friends. Not that Nick and Kai were friends, but they knew each other and moved in the same circles."

Maybe this would not be a waste of time, no matter what Stacy Henshaw thought.

"And exactly what circles were that?"

 

 

After some more questions Ms Henshaw leaves. Lou leads Mr Golyan into the interrogation room to make him sweat for a bit, before they confront him with what they've learned.

When they enter the office, Jerry is standing next to the table, drumming his fingers on it in quick rhythm.

"There you are, guys!" He grins his delighted grin that means he found something good. Despite his earlier doubts, Steve is more than glad that they have him on board.

"You know how we noticed that all but one of the victims here in Ohau worked in emergency services? Same goes for all the other locations. Well, not that it were all but one, but that it were a lot. The others were teachers as well, or judges, park rangers, county officials, a marine. Any of that ring a bell?"

Steve frowns at the list of occupations, before his eyes snap up.

"They're all receiving state provided moon-shift suppressants."

"Ten points to Gryffindor! Exactly. Eric's running tests on their suppressants right now, but I think it's pretty likely that it's got something to do with this."

Steve spins around as the glass door to their offices is pushed open.

Eric crashes through them, his coat askew, his face impossibly pale.

"You were right, Jerry, you were right." He looks around, his eyes going wide and his skin taking a decidedly green tint. "Where's uncle D?" His voice goes shrill at the end. "Steve, where's Uncle Danny?"

"Whoa, Eric, calm down, I send him home to cool his heels."

"It's the same distributer. It's the same one Danny uses!"

"What?"

"The victims, the Wolves gone feral, they've received their suppressants from the same distributer as him!"

The thing that's been restricting Steve's chest ever since Danny drove off suddenly squeezes tight, his breath turning ragged.

He's out of the door before he even realizes he's moving.

Not Danny, please, please not Danny.

Steve's running out of the building, his vision tunneling. He's in the car and flooring it, seeing without really registering that Grover jumped in next to him.

His phone rings. He's halfway to Danny's place. He almost ignores it, but then the ring tone filters in.

Danny.

"Danny! Listen we-"

"Steve."

Steve closes his eyes, just for a second as he hears the low rumble of Danny's voice. He doesn't sound good. He really doesn't sound good.

"Danny-"

"Close-" Danny is breathing too loud. "Y'need to, to close off my place. Get, get people away. 'm... 'm going f'ral, Steve."

He hears Grover calling HPD, tells them to card of the area, get people with heavy duty sedative at Detective William's place.

"You're going to be alright, Danny, you hear me? We're on our way, we're just a few minutes out, we-"

"Don't wanna hurt you. Don't wanna hurt anyone. Promise-" He coughs and Steve winces at the painful quality of his voice. "Promise me, Steve, someone's gonna, gonna take me out if-"

"No!"

"Steve." How can his voice be so gentle right now, how can he sound so calm, if he can barely breathe right, if he's asking Steve to- "Steve, I can't hurt anyone. I don't want to live with that."

Steve wipes the tears from his face, wants to close his eyes, but he can't he needs to see the road, because he can't risk anything that might delay their arrival, they need to get there, he needs to get to Danny.

He knows it's selfish, but he doesn't want to promise Danny, doesn't want to force himself into any kind of position where he might have to take a shot at him...

"Please."

...but it's Danny, and no matter what, he'll always put his needs first.

"I promise."

The words taste like blood on his tongue.

 

#

 

Team pulls up at Danny's place, Chin, Kono and Eric right behind Steve and Lou. There are two regular squad cars.

And Rachel.

Grace runs towards him, before he's even all out of the car, Rachel following her not far behind.

"Steve! What the hell is going on?"

"Rachel, the two of you need to stay back, or better even, you need to leave."

"I'm not leaving, Uncle Steve!"

Williams' stubbornness at its finest. He can't imagine them without it, but right now it doesn't make his life any easier.

"Grace-"

"I'm not!" Her fists are clenched and her jaw set in a very familiar manner.

Steve scrubs his hand over his face, suppressing a sigh. "Alright, but you need to stay back. Danny's going feral and I don't even want to imagine what it'd do to him, if you got caught up in it."

Rachel slaps her hands in front of her mouth.

Grace eyes are huge as she grabs onto Steve's arm. She looks around at the police men, all wearing weapons.

"You can't hurt him. He's _Danno_." Steve's chest constricts at the pain and the confusion in her trembling voice. It's the same pain and confusion he's feeling.

"Grace, I-"

There's a sudden crashing sound from behind him and he spins around.

The next moment a pained, loud howling disrupts the day.

"Dammit!" He turns back to Rachel and Grace. "You need to get back."

"Steve-"

"Now, Rachel!" He looks at Eric, who nods and pulls both of them back behind the relative safety of the squad cars and armed police officers.

He can see Grace crying and god does he wish he could do the same.

But right now he can't, he needs to be Lieutenant Commander Steve McGarrett who gets the job done no matter the personal cost.

"Chin, ETA on the sedatives?"

"They're still seven minutes out."

Seven minutes might normally not be a long stretch of time, but right now it's an eternity.

"Alright, listen up. This is Detective Williams who's inside. He's fallen victim to the same person who has forced the previous Feral Cases. Do not let him leave the premises, but if you have to shoot, remember, he is a victim, aim for non-vital areas."

Steve stands behind the hood of the truck, hoping, praying to whoever might listen that Danny will stay inside his house for as long as it takes for the sedatives to arrive. The last incidents have been in public places or in the company of other people. Maybe being in his own territory will keep Danny inside - and out of harm's way.

For a short while it looks like Fortuna is with them.

But Steve knows better than to relax. Sedatives are still three minutes out.

"Grace, get in the damn car!"

Steve's head whips around at Rachel's loud voice, her face a mixture of terror and anger. Grace has a similar expression, though she is leaning decidedly more towards anger.

"I will not! You go, I'm not going to leave Danno!"

Steve flinches as there's a responding sound from the flat. They hadn't been able to see Danny before, but now a huge shadow moves behind the windows. The sound of shattering glass, for all that it's not loud, is deafening to Steve's ears.

God dammit.

A huge sand colored Wolf stands on the grass in front of the window. His teeth are bared, flews pulled up. A deep and loud growling sound emanates from his barrel-thick chest.

Steve can feel it in his bones.

Danny barks, but has yet to move any closer to them.

He starts prowling, never taking his eyes off of the officers. It's a stalemate and Steve hopes it'll hold.

The growling has dropped to a low rumbling sound, but his body language is anything but relaxed.

Danny moves slightly closer to one of the squad cars. Steve can see that he's testing, that he's not actually attacking, but one of the officers flinches back and yanks up his gun. Danny snarls, jumps towards him. The sound of gunshots rip through the air. A yowl follows and Steve's blood freezes.

Danny backs off. He's limping, but he' moving and Steve can feel his heart beating again.

A whine sounds from behind him, followed by another yowl, the voice much higher now.

Something runs past them and Chin makes a grab for it.

It's Grace.

Grace is running straight towards Danny.

"No!"

Steve is not sure if it's his voice or Rachel's, but he's sprinting, putting everything he's got into it, but he doesn't reach her and Danny jumps up and Grace barrels straight into him and he's too late and it's going to kill Danny, it doesn't matter how else the day plays out he's never going to be the same because Grace-

Because Grace is hugging him.

Steve comes to a stop, standing in the no-mans-land between the Wolf and the cops and he stares at the two people in front of him.

Grace hides her face in Danny's thick hide. He's staring at the rest of them, positioning himself between Grace and the guns, ears pulled back.

Someone yips behind him, but Steve doesn't turn around and a second later Eric moves past him and is dropping down next to Danny, shifted before his knees hit the ground.

Grace starts shifting as well and just a moment later three Wolves lie in front of him. Grace is the only one resembling the size of a regular wolf, the other two massive in size.

As much as Steve would love to be part of such a cuddle pile on a regular pack night, right now his current position is not one that he's comfortable with.

Steve shifts his weight slightly and Danny's gaze snaps up, locking onto his eyes. He should look away, he knows that, shouldn't provoke the Wolf, but those are not the eyes of a wolf. Those are the clear blue eyes of Danny.

The rumbling sound reaches Steve's ears again and he snaps his gaze down.

Shit, shit, shit.

He tries moving back, slowly as not to aggravate the Wolf any further, but a sharp bark stops him.

He is so fucked. Danny is so fucked.

Goddamn it.

Everything around him slows down and he's not aware of anything happening elsewhere. His focus is reduced to the ground under his feet, his own breathing, which is growing labored, and the three Wolves in front of him that keep staring at him with eyes that belong into different faces.

He doesn't know what's going on. Danny was forced into a Feral shift, but the other two weren't. Why did they shift? Are they going with their instincts and if so, does the aggravation of their alpha stand higher than their human mind?

He doesn't know what he has to expect.

Danny keeps starring at him, his ears perked. Steve keeps him in his vision without looking directly at him.

He's lucky the first time didn't royally fuck them over.

A yip sounds and it's too deep to be from Grace.

He looks up, keeps his eyes trained somewhere slightly above the Wolves. Danny thumps his tail against the ground once, then yips again.

Steve stays put, doesn't move a muscle.

Grace huffs and it sounds just like Rachel does when she's at her most exasperated with Danny.

Which really shouldn't work, because she is, as mentioned, currently a Wolf.

She gets up and trots over, nudging Steve's side with her snout.

He stumbles, looks down.

She doesn't look or act in any kind or way aggressive, but he still doesn't know what's going on.

She prods him again, this time in the back of his legs and he almost falls backwards.

"Grace, what do you want?"

She takes a bit of fabric of his trousers between her teeth and pulls, very carefully.

That would be a point in the 'still human mind' category.

Against his better judgment, Steve lets himself be pulled towards the pile of Wolves.

Apparently against the better judgment of Lou as well.

"Steve! What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Danny's ears snap back and he barks once towards Lou, before settling down, still growling loudly.

Steve stands frozen, until Danny looks at him and yips again.

Damn it he really can't refuse the man anything - even if he's not currently a man.

And he's probably currently losing every leg to stand on in terms of his continuous claims of not being reckless.

When Steve's reaches Eric and Danny, he's not sure what to do. Grace just plops down next to her dad again, curling into his side.

Danny whines and thumps his tail on the ground again. Steve's not sure what he's trying to communicate, until Grace huffs again and pulls him down by his trouser leg.

Steve sits down next to the huge Wolf, trying to keep enough distance not to crowd him, but Danny just sighs and flops against him.

While he appears to relax a bit, Steve can still feel the powerful muscles under his coat shift and his eyes never leave the gathered cops and their team.

A car stops behind the row of squad cars, the driver handing out boxes to the officers. The sedatives have arrived.

Finally.

At least now Steve no longer has to fear for Danny getting hurt any further.

He lets his gaze drift over the thick pelt until he sees the dark red stain marking it. It's a graze on his right leg and while it doesn't seem to be too bad, Steve would still very much like to put some pressure on it to stop the bleeding.

But no matter how calm Danny appears now, Steve cannot forget that whatever forced him to shift send the other victims into a feral rampage.

He's not going to risk Danny's well-being or the safety of Grace and Eric now.

Steve looks back at the others, who are still in position, but seem calmer now as they're neither faced with having to potentially shoot one of their own nor have a Wolf that's on the offensive.

That calm stays until Rachel, who's so far stayed in line with the cops, wringing her hands, sometimes gripping the cloth of her blouse, takes a step forward, past the line of policemen and -women.

From one second to the next Danny is up and towering over the three of them, positioning himself between them and the others - and their guns.

"Danny." Steve slowly reaches out and puts his hand onto the Wolf's coarse fur. "Danny, it's alright, they are not going to hurt anyone." He redirects the next part slightly towards the others, raising his voice a bit to carry better. "Or going to come any closer."

Danny's still growling, but he slowly settles down again, his bright eyes locked onto those he seems to perceive as a threat.

Steve sighs. Looks like he's going to be in for a bit of a long night.

 

It's getting dark, the space where they are sitting only illuminated by the street lamps. Normally they'd put up flood lamps, but Steve's guess is that they're trying to keep Danny calm and maybe even hope he's going to sleep.

No such luck so far.

Eric gets up and leaves them at some point, returning with a paper bag gripped between his teeth. He drops it in Steve's lap.

"What's this?"

Well, having a Wolf roll his eyes on him, that's a new one.

Steve pulls the bag open and finds something to eat for himself and what he's pretty sure is intended for the Wolves. He pulls it out and frees it of its wrapping, before giving each Wolf a part of it.

 

The sky changes slowly from a pitch black to something lighter. A moment later there's a quiet whine and the Wolf curls in on himself, until the warmth of the fur leaves in favor of the soft feeling of skin and Danny slumps against him. Steve looks down on his partner who's curled up into a small ball. He's shivering and covered in goosebumps.

Steve pokes, very carefully, at Eric.

The Wolf lifts his big head and stares blearily at Steve.

"Hey. Can you get your uncle a blanket from inside? If I move now, he'll wake up."

Eric looks down and perks up, when he sees Danny back in his human form.

As Eric trots away to get the requested blanket, Steve wishes, he was wearing a jacket or anything with which he could cover Danny up already. He doesn't want to wait the few moments it'll take to get the blanket, wants to shield Danny, from the cold and from possible gazes of others.

Eric comes back and Steve covers Danny up with the soft blanket he brings. Maybe he should just wake him, but Danny looks exhausted and he really doesn't want him to have to deal with the fallout that this is going to have. Neither on the practical side, with examinations, interviews and questions, nor with the emotional.

Especially not with the emotional.

Although everything did turn out rather fortunate, there's no way around the fact that it could have ended a lot worse. And that Danny's agency about his own mind and body had been taken away from him.

A snout nuzzling his face drags him back out of his dark thoughts. He blinks at Grace, trying for a smile. She licks his cheek, before bounding back to the cars, Eric close on her heels, where her mother hugs her tightly, before starting on what looks like a pretty impressive scolding.

 

 Steve has almost dropped off, when Danny starts moving next to him. Steve blinks his eyes open and looks down, seeing Danny turn his face into Steve's side, taking a deep breath, before he blinks and stretches.

A second later Danny jerks up, sitting rigid, his eyes wide open, looking at his surroundings.

He turns and stares at Steve, wide-eyed.

"What..."

He turns to look around again, flinches and Steve leans over without thinking, pulling him back in, hugging him close.

"I..." Danny's voice is scratchy, thin.

He swallows stares down at his hands before gripping the blanket tightly and wraps it close around himself.

"Who'd I hurt?"

Steve tightens his hug for a second, before murmuring just low enough for Danny to hear: "No one, Danny."

Danny shakes his head, still looking off somewhere else, not really looking at anything.

"Danny, look at me."

He waits until Danny turns his head, until he finally raises his eyes to look at him. Steve waits a second, gets lost a bit in those bright blue eyes, the same eyes that looked back at him from a wolf's face, but so much more pain and fear in them now. Steve wants to wipe it all away, make every last shred of it disappear.

Danny isn't supposed to look like that.

"You didn't hurt anyone. Yes, you shifted and when we got here, you were aggressive. But we managed to evacuate the area because we had warning. You didn't attack anyone, you where jumpy but-"

He stops. How can he explain this, without telling him about Eric and Grace? Should he tell him about them? Steve doesn't want to keep it a secret, but he doesn't want Danny to become even more agitated.

"You were jumpy, but the presence of other Wolves calmed you."

Danny squints at him and something inside of Steve relaxes when he sees the familiar look of suspicion in his eyes.

"What Wolves."

"Werewolves."

"Very funny. Steve, what Wolves? Don't think you trying to evade the answer to this question oh so subtly will dissuade me from asking it and expecting an answer.

"So tell me. What. Wolves."

Steve closes his eyes, just for a second.

"Your pack."

"My pack. As in, Grace was here?"

His voice has gone higher, but he's not pulling back and Steve is taking that as a good sign. Or as a not entirely bad sign.

"Yeah, she and Eric were here."

"Did I not just hear you say that you managed to evacuate the whole area, Steven?"

"Well, yes, we did. But they reached your house somehow and you know Grace, she's as stubborn as you. And don't get me started on Rachel. They refused to leave."

"And Eric?"

"Refused to stay behind, when we realized that you could be in danger."

Danny glares and looks away. Then he glares at Steve.

"Alright. This is still not acceptable, but I don't feel like yelling at you, while I sit on my front yard, basically naked."

Unbidden Steve's gaze wanders down, over his friend's body. He obviously knew that Danny didn't wear anything under the blanket, but it was just sort of something that was there somewhere in his mind.

Now he can't not think about it.

He swallows and pulls back.

"Alright, then you better get inside and get something to wear." So that he can think of something else but his partner basically cuddling up to him - naked. "So you can yell at me better."

He helps Danny up when he struggles to get to his feet without losing the blanket.

Because Steve doesn't want him to lose that. He really doesn't. It would be bad, because Danny's just been through a lot and he doesn't need that on top of everything else.

No other reason.

 

After Danny gets clothed, Steve bundles him into his car and drives him off to the hospital. He'd love to tuck him in a bed, because he still doesn't look all that awake, but now that the worst is over Steve is afraid of any possible lasting effect of anything thanks to the drug.

That they still haven't found out what it actually does.

The other surviving victims haven't shown any signs of negative effects later on, but Steve can't be sure and considering that this is Danny they're talking about he really doesn't want to take any chances.

So, no matter how much the man might be grumbling, he will endure an examination.

Once they've reached the hospital he's ushered in to an examination room and Steve has to stay outside. He should probably sit down, stop annoying the rest of the people who're waiting, but he really can't sit still right now. So he starts pacing and keeps on pacing until Danny comes back out.

Steve hurries up to his side, looking him over, but he doesn't look too worried, mostly just disgruntled.

But that might possibly just be Danny.

"So?"

"So what."

"What did the doctor say?"

Danny sighs and scrubs his hands over his face.

"I should really just not tell you. You are a menace, can't you wait a second?"

Steve tries to straighten, to give Danny space, to pull himself together and appear calm and collected.

It doesn't work.

"Danny."

"Alright, alright. Well, they can't say anything concrete now, because they have to work on my blood work and do some additional observations and examinations, but so far there doesn't seem to be anything wrong."

Steve thinks about it for a moment, but Danny's not wrong. So he's going to let this one slide for now.

He'll just have to keep an eye on Danny until the results are back. He knows him pretty well by now so he's sure he'd notice if there was something off about him.

"Alright, let's go."

Danny raises his brows. "Go where?"

"Home."

"I can drive myself, thank you very much."

Steve shrugs.

"Well yes, you could. But considering that your car is still at your place it might be a bit difficult."

Danny frowns, but doesn't say anything, just walks past Steve towards the exit.

Steve keeps his eyes on him, as he follows him outside, but he doesn't seem too bad. He holds himself rigid, but Steve can't quite determine, if that's because he's tired and trying not to show it, or if it's something else.

Nothing to do about it now though.

He gets into the car after Danny and pulls out of the parking lot.

Danny leans back into the seat and closes his eyes. Steve really wants to ask how he's feeling, but for all that Danny always complains about Steve bottling his emotions up, he isn't all that great with actually talking about the really important things either.

And his Wolf going feral is bound to be a difficult topic.

Steve will just have to make sure that he doesn't think this thing makes his friends see him as anything but the man they always have. It doesn't make him anything out of control, or the wild animal that some people still say Werewolves are.

He's still Danny, a hothead and a deeply loving and lovable person.

 

 

~~*~~


	3. Chapter 3

Danny must have nodded off during the drive back home, because one moment he's closing his eyes to escape the McGarrett Eyes Of Concern that haven't left him from the moment he woke up on his front lawn, and the next the car is pulling up the drive way.

Steve's driveway that is.

"Steven?"

"Yes?"

"What am I doing here?"

Steve blinks at him.

"Don't play cute with me. Why are we at your place and not at, you know my place? The place I live at? Where I have my stuff and my bed, and the chance to, you know, rest without a madman jumping around?"

Steve shrugs. "Because you have some stuff here from when you stayed over the last time. And you need rest and here you can have it without worrying about things like dinner or people coming over.

"Or, you know, clearing out broken glass and dealing with a cool draft from one of your windows that should be boarded over."

Danny groans and thumps his head against the window. "Shit, I totally forgot about that. Steve, turn the car around, I can't just leave my house unprotected. If I'm lucky I still have some of my belongings left and I'd rather keep that last bit of property from being taken away as well."

Steve just waves him off as he parks the car in front of his house.

"Don't worry, HPD has stationed a cop there, so nothing's going to get stolen. And Kamekona is coming around with his cousin later and is going to board up your window." He smiles his big dorky smile. "Everything is handled, you can just rest."

Danny follows him inside. "Yeah, because that is going to calm me down."  It actually does, but it wouldn't do to let Steve in on that.

Though he might already know. Maybe. Possibly.

Sometimes Steve can be very perceptive and he's been exposed to the Williams' Way of Grumbling and Complaining for many years now.

Doesn't matter. There's still the question of keeping up appearance. So he'll continue his grumbling for however long he likes. Even if it's just to make himself feel better. To do something familiar while his thoughts keep circling and swirling, ever closer to a deep dark hole that is going to pull him under and drown him if he doesn't look out.

Because he just shifted into a Wolf without any kind of his own intentions or will. Without remembering any of it, because it wasn't his mind occupying the Wolf's, is was pure instinct.

And his Grace had been there. And Eric. And Steve. And the team.

He could have attacked them, could have hurt them, could have _killed_ them and then he'd have the taste of their blood in his mouth and he'd have to live with the knowledge that he's just a wild beast that goes around and kills and-

"Breath, Danny, you need to breath!"

He feels his head being pressed down between his legs and when did he sit down?

"Listen to me, can you do that? Do you hear my voice, Danny?"

The hand on his neck is gripping tightly and it should be too tight, but instead it's calming and it centers him, anchors him in the now, drags him back form the swirling maelstrom back closer to shore, to some resemblance of safety, of stable ground.

"That's good, Danny, in and out, deep breaths, that's good. In and out."

Slowly this surroundings come back into focus. The rushing in his ears subsides and the gray at the corner of his eyes pull back. He can hear his breathing again, labored and loud as it is. He remembers that there's a Steve attached to the hand that's been calming him down, that it's _Steve_ who keeps running circles over his skin with his finger.

It's Steve who's talking to him in a strong but calm voice, pulling him back, word for word, syllable by syllable.

Embarrassment curls deep in his stomach, but he's not ready to pull back, not yet. His mind tells him to, tells him to salvage at least a little bit of dignity, but he doesn't want to let go of the safety that Steve gives him, that lets him breath despite felling shaky all over.

He's going to pull back. Just another moment.

Just one more.

Steve's voice is quieter now, soft.

"You back with me?"

Danny blinks, trying to take a deep breath. Air enters his lungs without any complication and it leaves without as well.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm alright."

He sits back up, mourning the loss of the hand on his neck as it's dislodged. But he needs to pull himself together.

He breathes a little easier when Steve sits down on the armchair next to him, his food nudging Danny's.

"Alright. You wanna lie down?"

Danny hums and stretches out on the couch. Mostly to avoid looking at Steve.

The sound of Steve's steps is retreating into the direction of the kitchen, before they suddenly squeak on the floor and he hurries back.

"Wait, get back up again."

"What? I thought I was supposed to rest. I distinctly remember you telling me to get some rest. I especially remember that being the reason you kidnapped me and brought me here."

"Stop whining and get up. You need rest and you won't get that if you lie here."

"Where else am I supposed to lie down then?"

Steve starts poking him, getting Danny to stand up. He sways, reaching out and catches himself on Steve's arm.

After lying down for a bit his limbs suddenly feel heavy and leaden and he'd really like to lie down again.

"Up the stairs, go on."

Danny follows Steve's instruction, as he keeps giving him slight shoves every now and again if he stops. He's almost up the stairs when his brain starts to work again.

"Wait. Upstairs? There's only your bedroom upstairs."

Steve looks at him like he's slow. Okay, alright, he is slow, but he's tired, alright? He's allowed to be slow. Also that still doesn't answer his question.

"And?"

"And where am I supposed to sleep then?" He doesn't contemplate the obvious answer.

Doesn't let himself.

Steve on the other hand doesn't extend him the same courtesy.

"In the bedroom?"

"Steve, I'm not throwing you out of your bed."

"For one, the bed is wide enough for two people. And two, it's pretty early, so I'm not going to bed yet. Just go to sleep and get some rest."

Danny wants to protest, because let's be honest here, when doesn't he want to protest, but he's so tired and the promise of a soft mattress and some hours of undisturbed sleep sound heavenly right now.

Maybe after that he'll be better equipped to deal with the mess that is waiting to happen.

He nods and trudges up the last steps and into Steve's room. He only notices that Steve's followed him when a pair of trousers and a well-worn shirt land on the mattress next to him.

He turns to look at Steve. Who's just shrugging somewhat awkwardly. If Steve did awkward. Which he doesn't. So it's some other kind of emotion that Danny just can't figure out right now.

Because his brain is mush.

"You can't sleep comfortably in those clothes."

Danny looks down at himself, at the jeans and button down he pulled on earlier. He hadn't been aware of what he was wearing before now.

He starts pulling off his clothes, then turns with his shirt only half off.

"Would you mind?"

Steve grins. "Sure. Wouldn't want to upset your delicate, Victorian sensibilities."

Danny snorts and changes his clothes once Steve has left the room.

Steve's clothes are soft to the touch and they smell of detergent and Steve. He closes his eyes for a moment and breathes in.

There's a soft knock on the door frame and Danny whirls around, his face heating up.

But Steve doesn't seem to have noticed anything. "Brought you some water."

Danny smiles, but makes no move to fetch the glass. His legs don't want to move so he stays put. He's sure he'd just fall on his nose otherwise.

Steve doesn't move either, just stands there and stares at Danny.

"Steve?"

Steve heaves a deep breath. "I'm glad you're okay."

He looks away for a second before heading over and handing Danny the glass of water.

Danny drinks a few sips before putting the glass down on the bedside table.

He sits down and slides under the sheets, turning on his side and looks up at Steve.

"Thank you."

Danny's not sure if he managed to say it. His eyes are suddenly heavy and he's pulled under.

He's also pretty sure that there wasn't actually a hand running through his hair.

"I don't know what I would've done if you weren't."

 

#

 

Danny comes awake with a cry. It's dark around him and his heart pounds away in his chest. He gulps deep breaths, his hands clenched into the sheets so tightly that his joints hurt, but he can't let go, needs the contact.

After a few moments some kind of noise filters in. It's rumbly and nice and calms him, makes him think of the sea and guns and the sun and all things that shouldn't make him feel save, but they do.

"-mare. You're alright, you're safe, Grace is safe, the team and Eric are safe. You are safe, you didn't hurt anyone. It's just a nightmare, nothing happened, you're safe, Grace is safe, Eric is safe, the team is safe-"

"Steve?"

He's breathing too quickly, but he can't stop it.

"I'm right here."

Danny gropes in the darkness until his hand hit's something warm. An arm, that's Steve's arm on the mattress next to him. He grips it, probably too tight, but he can't let go.

The arm shifts a bit under his hand and he whines. Steve doesn't pull away and a moment later his other hand is on his shoulder, massaging it lightly.

Danny's breathing slows down.

"You back with me?"

"Yeah."

Danny breathes, in and out, and he should pull back, but he's afraid that he'll be sucked into the darkness if he lets go of his anchor.

"Think you can go back to sleep?"

"Probably not."

He's been sleeping for way too long and the terror of the nightmare is still lurking somewhere in his mind.

The mattress is too soft, the sound of waves on the shore is too loud and the bed smells of Steve.

He's certainly not going to be able to go back to sleep.

Steve's voice rumbles close to his ear. "When I fist started at the academy we had his teacher, Bowen. We hated him. Not because he was a hardass, there were plenty others like that. And it sucked, you just had to deal with it. But this guy, he was just a dick. Enjoyed to humiliate us, played favorites, didn't put any effort into his classes. So one night Yeun comes up with this idea for a prank. The next day some of us lifted his car out of the parking lot and put it into the gym. He was livid when he found it." Steve's chuckle sends warmth down Danny's spine. "Two days later it was gone again, this time it was behind the kitchens - and we weren't the ones who put it there. I think this whole thing went on for almost a month, every few days someone would move the car. I even heard a rumor that one group was caught doing it, but the teacher just gave them shit for not finding a better place to hide it." Danny listens to Steve's breathing, listens to his soft voice as he talks about more things he experienced at the academy. Talks about things he did with his team from the SEALS that aren't declared classified. Talks about the prank war he helped Mary wage on a classmate that she had in primary school. Tells him about surfing, tells him about the sea. Tells him about the smell of his father's cologne and what magical tricks his mother taught him.

Danny falls asleep to the soft rumble of his voice.

 

 

The next day Steve's gone before Danny's finished his coffee. He's still bleary and just nods when he tells him that he's heading to HQ. Tells him a cop brought over the Camaro. Tells him to rest and to call him if there's anything he needs.

Danny just nods. Too many words, too little coffee.

When his brain comes back online he's a bit put out that Steve's headed to work without him, but he doesn't really want to face the rest of the team right now either.

He tells himself that they won't look at him any different, that he hasn't actually _done_ anything, but he can't silence the fear that resides deep inside of him.

Danny leaves Steve's house, activating the alarm system and drives home.

As promised the window is boarded over and most of the glass that must have been littering the ground has been removed, though there are still fine shards glittering in the sun.

Danny pulls his door open, stopping in the doorway. He'd come home just like this the other day. Not thinking of anything bad, his head on the case. He'd made himself something to eat, sat down in front of the TV. He doesn't know what he was watching, just remembers the sudden pressure in his mind, in his stomach, in his muscles. He'd been so confused for a moment, didn't know what was going on.

Until it clicked.

He might have called Steve, must have called him, but he doesn't remember that.

Then there was nothing, pure nothingness.

Not- not so pure.

He frowns. There's something in the back of his mind, a fuzzy something, some kind of contentedness that his instinctual side feels.

He doesn't know where it stems from, just that it somehow feels connected to the events yesterday.

He ponders for a moment, but he doesn't feel anything else so he ignores it for now and steps further inside the flat. He takes a long and warm shower. Drinks some more coffee. Eats something that would have Steve frown disapprovingly at him. Watches TV.

Danny flops over on the couch with a groan. He can't just keep dawdling away his time. He either needs to think about what the events mean for him or he needs to head to work and face his teammates.

Neither option appeals to him right now.

But that doesn't change that he has to do _something_. He can't just stay here and hide out in his flat.

After washing his coffee cup he heads into his bedroom and changes into his working clothes. Putting on the slacks and button down, he calms down a bit. No matter what shit's going down for him personally right now, he still has a job to do. A very important job that protects people, a job he is very good at, thank you very much.

He's still got something to give while he figures out what he's doing with the rest of it.

So he heads out, and heads toward that job.

 

 

"Danny!" The shout is shrill and the next moment he's got his arms full of a happy Kono who's hugging him so tightly that he's a little bit afraid for his back.

It doesn't stop him from hugging her back. He relaxes a bit more. "Hello to you, too."

Chin grins at him and squeezes his shoulders when he gets closer. "Welcome back."

Lou just waves, but he looks undeniably relieved.

No one is glaring, no one is avoiding him.

His gaze lands on Steve.

He stands corrected. One person is glaring.

"Danny, what are you doing here?"

"Uhm" he looks around. "Trying to work?"

"Don't you think-"

"No." He infuses as much emphasis into the one word as he can. "I really don't think."

Steve pulls up short. Danny can see the gears shift behind his forehead. Then he nods and heads over, pulling him into a hug as well.

The last of his tension evaporates.

He's home.

After a moment he pulls back.

"Alright, slackers, we've got work to do."

 

Danny calls the distributors, making sure that the moon-shift-suppressants are no longer handed out and that everyone who's been taking them is undergoing a thorough examination.

The rest of the team try to find out who was working in the production and distribution chain during the times that a town experienced a culmination of Feral Behavior cases. It's a tedious task, not made easier by anyone until they tell them what kind of consequences they will be facing if they get in the way of the investigation.

It still takes them the rest of the day until they've tracked down a very likely suspect.

Gordon Kalima, age 58, widowed. He has two daughters, but they live far away from his current address. As well as the last four addresses he had.

There's not much they can do at this time of the night, so they all head home. Against Steve's protest Danny drives home to his own place. No matter how much a tiny part of himself wants to bury himself in Steve's pillows, let the smell of him, the sound of his breathing calm him down and lull him into sleep again, he can't do that.

Steve is his friend and Danny is not someone who is weak, who needs Steve to deal with what's going on with him right now.

He opens his door and enters the flat.

It's dark and it's empty and there are smells of people he doesn't know.

There's also still the scent of his terror lingering. He doesn't want to remember those minutes when he realized what was about to happen but was already too far down the rabbit hole to do anything about it. Anything more than call Steve.

He's glad he called Steve.

Danny sighs and scrubs his face and gets ready for bed on auto-pilot.

It takes him a long time to fall asleep.

 

 

Danny wakes to the sound of waves crashing on the shore. The wind rustles the palm trees and he smells salt and sand, sunlight and gunpowder.

He grumbles and rolls into a tighter ball, before stretching out.

He wants to be closer to the smell. Not outside. The warm and living smell is inside, behind the door. He trots over and scratches it slightly.

The whine in his throat snaps his mind back in place.

Shit. Shit, shit, shit, how the hell did he end up in front of Steve's place? In his Wolf form?

He sniffs, his nose high in the air, trying to see if there's anyone around, then he trots off, hoping that Steve is doing the sensible thing for once and actually sleeping.

He really doesn't want to explain why he's here in the first place.

Not that he'd know the answer himself.

 

#

 

Danny has barely slept at all the night before, too afraid of winding up at Steve's place again. Still, even though he's in the palace way too early, Steve is already there when Danny enters the office. Danny would like to pretend that it's because he's dedicated and has an impeccable working morale. But it's probably because Danny wouldn't let him pick him up, so now he has to be there to check up on him as early as possible.

It's as annoying as it's adorable.

Not that he'll ever tell Steve that. Instead he rolls his eyes at him and heads into his own office.

And tries to ignore the smell of Steve that seems to be even more enticing then it was ever before.

Must be sleep deprivation.

And prolonged exposure. After so many years he was bound to snap at some point.

The next time he looks up from his work, Steve is on the phone and the rest of the team are either in their offices or at the tech table.

Steve's face is determined and he nods, hangs up and heads out of the office, his steps military precise.

"We've got an address. And an arrest warrant."

Danny's head snaps up, both at the prospect of being able to go after the asshole that's been making the ultimate Wolves' nightmare come true for himself and too many other people and at Steve going through proper channels for once.

Not risking their case to fall through.

 

As far as they can tell Kalima is not a dangerous man per se. But they still gather there in full force with all security measures they have.

Steve turns to him once they've reached the front door.

"Do you want to do the honors?"

Danny nods. Does he ever.

He pounds on the door, not even trying to hide the fury in his voice.

"Gordon Kalima! Five-0! Open your door immediately."

There's no noise from inside.

Danny looks at Steve for a second, seeing nothing but support in his face. He grins, and maybe he imagines his teeth shifting a bit towards their canine counterparts. Maybe he doesn't.

They move in and through the house.

There's no one there and Danny can't stop the growl that starts as barely more than a quiet rumble until it's so loud that it's audible in the whole flat.

Steve curses and whips out his phone.

"Jerry. - No, he wasn't here. - Yeah. No, I want you to try to figure out if here's anyone he could be with, any acquaintance, girlfriend, boyfriend, bowling group, I don't care. Yeah."

He hangs up again.

"We're going to go over everything that's here. Look for evidence to nail him down, look for anything that might tell us where he could be."

They split up, going through everything.

After a few moments Kono yells:

"Guys? In the bedroom."

Danny hurries over where Kono is standing with a stack of letters in her hand.

She looks up when they enter.

"These are bills. One is for a storage unit in Kaneohe."

"Good." Steve holsters his gun and turns towards the team.

"Danny and I will check the storage. Chin, Kono, you stay here in case he comes back." He turns to Lou. "Get in contact with the company renting out the storage units, find out anything you can about the unit, what he might have there, anything they know about him."

They nod, but Danny can see that they itch to accompany them. They don't protest though, they know that the possibility of him returning is there and that they can't risk Kalima realizing someone's gone through his stuff and make an escape.

But they're out for a pound of flesh as well.

This case has become personal.

Danny tries not to dwell on how his team mates, his family must have felt when they got his phone call.

He can't even begin to imagine how he himself would have felt in their place.

Steve floors it on the way to the storage unit. Danny manages to yell at him only twice. He's not sure if he's just becoming too used to his partner's driving style or if it's the adrenaline's fault.

The storage unit is a rundown thing, certainly on the cheaper side. There are barely any cameras and it's not visible from the street or surrounding buildings.

They move along the unit doors until Steve signals him that they've reached the right one.

Danny has to suppress the growl that builds up in his throat, before it gets out, before he alarms the suspect.

Because he's here. Danny can smell him.

Steve grips the handle of the garage door. He looks back at Danny and seeing him in position he pulls it up in a quick motion, stepping back and raising his gun. Danny steps forward and trains his gun on the man in the storage unit.

"Five-0! Hands where I can see them."

Kalima looks thinner than he did in his picture, almost gaunt. He slowly raises his hands, looking somewhat confused.

"Uhm, what?"

Steve holsters his gun again and pulls out some zip ties.

"Gordon Kalima, you're under arrest for second degree murder and the violation of the Lycan Rights Agreement. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be appointed to you by the court."

Kalima just stands there, not trying anything, but not looking as if he knows what he's done wrong either.

It makes Danny's skin crawl.

Steve is almost at his side now, already reaching out when Kalima falls down.

No, he doesn't fall.

He _shifts_.

Steve shouts in surprise, trying to get a grip on the Wolf but he doesn't manage to do it. Instead he's shoved to the side. Steve turns, reaches for him again and Kalima snarls, his teeth sinking into Steve's forearm, before taking off.

Danny doesn't even think about his gun. He hears it clatter to the ground, but by then he's already shifted into his Wolf form.

He pauses just long enough to see Steve getting back up again, then he's off, running after Kalima, making up ground quickly, until he's on him, running into him, throwing him down. A high pitched whimper, then he's trying to get back up. Danny's on him, not letting him up. He smells fear, smells fury and a sharp smell of chemicals. There's fur in his mouth and Kalima rips free, manages to get on his feet and buries his teeth in Danny's shoulder. There's the sound of blood hitting the ground, of growling and snarling, Kalima yelping when Danny gets a hold of him, tasting blood when he sinks his teeth in any part of him he can reach.

Danny has his anger and fury on his side, his sheer bulk, but Kalima is desperate and fearing for his life.

Not without good reason.

Danny's not feral, he's really not. His rational mind is still there. But Danny is a hothead at the best of times.

If he's honestly enraged, there's nothing stopping him.

Now that his instincts and human mind align in their thirst for vengeance, he's not sure he'll be able to stop.

He is out for blood. He wants this man to suffer for the pain he unleashed on so many people, for attacking Steve in front of him.

Danny becomes aware of words being shouted. Some of those may or may not be his name. Some words might have been 'stop'. But he doesn't care. Not right now.

Not until Kalima is either done or has given up. He's not a cop now, he's a Wolf. He is not going to let someone like him off without breaking him, one way or another.

Kalima tries to get at Danny's throat. Danny evades him, gets a hold of his neck, and bites down.

Kalima goes unnaturally still. He pulls, but subsides with a whimper when Danny shakes him.

Danny's chest is heaving and he's glaring at the Wolf he's holding up as if he's nothing more than a rag doll. The smell of blood is all encompassing and he can't separate his own from his prey's.

"Danny, you need to let him go. Can you hear me? Danny. Danny, it's over, let him go, we need to take him in. You need to get checked out. Danny, you need to listen to me. Let go of him."

Danny's gaze zeroes in on Steve. Everything else has a blurry quality to it, but Steve is in sharp focus. Danny can see each of his graying hairs, can see the lines of worry, can see the specs of color in his eyes. Sees the calluses on his hands, left from years and years of handling guns.

He doesn't notice he's let go of Kalima until Steve takes a step closer.

He growls and positions himself between the two of them. He doesn't want Steve near him. He's unmoving, hurt, seems to have given up.

But Danny doesn't trust him. He's still dangerous.

"Kalima, if you want to get medical care in a somewhat timely manner, I deeply advise you to change back."

He doesn't react and Danny growls louder. The smaller wolf flinches.

He starts writhing on the ground. His form changes, his fur disappears. Just moments later, Kalima lies on the ground in his human form, naked and shaking. Danny's nose tells him that it's most definitely not just due to being cold.

"See if you can find his clothes."

When Danny hesitates, Steve looks hard at him. "Now, Danny I don't want to haul him around naked."

It costs him a bit of will and strength to actually leave. He still stops every few steps and looks back at them, making sure that Kalima's still down.

Steve is tying his wrists with zip ties. Danny finds Kalima's clothes on the ground where he shifted and hurries back outside.

Steve's still alright.

Danny drops the trousers in front of them. Steve grimaces when he realizes he'll have to help him get into them.

Usually Danny would make a crack, but he's both not in the mood and not in possession of the right vocal organs to do it.

Instead he keeps growling at their suspect.

Once he's got the trousers on, Steve pulls out his phone, calling an ambulance for the two Wolves and Danny turns to glare at him.

"Don't give me that look. I don't know what you were thinking, going at it with him like that! You're hurt, even if you seem to neither notice, nor care."

Danny looks down at himself. Now that Steve's mentioned it, he becomes aware of the many places that are smarting or throbbing.

It takes the ambulance a few minutes to arrive. HPD and the rest of the team are just moments behind them.

Lou walks up to them, watching as one of the EMTs cares about the wound on Steve's arm. "We should have been here. You shouldn't have come here, just the two of you."

Steve just shakes his head. "We didn't even know if he would actually be here. And it's not like we can change it now." But the look he throws Danny is one that he knows all too well. It's the one he always has when he blames himself for things that aren't his to shoulder.

Kono kneels down in front of Danny, her face worried. "You look terrible, brah."

Danny huffs and shakes his head.

"Alright, time to change back, buddy."

Danny blinks at Steve.

"Danny, the medics need to take a look at you."

Danny really doesn't want to shift back. He feels in control like this and he's not sure he won't fall apart if he shifts back. He doesn't want to do that, not in general, not in front of Steve or the team and most definitely not in front of the HPD.

So instead he plops down on the ground.

Steve murmurs something under his breath that sounds suspiciously like 'And he says I'm childish'.

One of the medics comes forward. "Don't worry, commander, we can look after him like this as well. And once we've got him at the hospital, we've got Werewolf specialists who can take over."

The thought of being in the hospital doesn't sit well with him. He's already dreading the smells of disinfectant, of sickness and grief and death.

But by now his shoulder is on fire and he can't stretch his left leg anymore, so he allows them to guide him towards the ambulance.

They make moves to close the door and Danny jumps up, snarls at them.

The young woman jumps back in shock, holding her hands up and out towards him, her eyes wide.

"Danny!"

Steve steps beside her, his voice sharp and reprimanding, but Danny can smell the worry under it. He whines and lies down flat, robbing towards Steve. It's hell on his injuries and he starts yowling, but he can't... he needs...

"Will you stay put?" Steve pulls himself up and into the back of the ambulance, burying his hand in an uninjured part of Danny's fur. Danny starts licking his arm and relaxes, bit by bit.

The medic frowns but slowly closes the doors again. Danny doesn't react and she shuts them completely.

The medic that's still in the back turns towards Steve.

"I guess you'll just have to head out with us."

Steve's still smelling all wrong and worrying, so while the medic starts working on Danny's wounds, Danny keeps licking any skin he can reach, hoping to make Steve feel better again, to make him not-sad anymore.

 

#

 

Danny wakes up to the smell of disinfectant and grief and sickness and death. It's dulled and he blinks his eyes open with great difficulty. Someone is in the room with him.

No, two someones. It's hard to concentrate. He hears them breathing, but he can't turn his head to look.

Smell. He should try to smell them.

He takes a deep breath, but the pain that shoots through his body at that has him gasping and fighting back tears.

"Danny! It's alright, what's wrong? Shit."

Everything is hazy and then suddenly warmth spreads through his limbs and the pain goes away. He still doesn't know who the two-

 

He's not as fuzzy when he wakes up again. Is it the second time? Or has he been awake more often?

He knows that he's in the hospital and he turns his head to the side. Grace is curled up on a cot just a short distance away. Between the cot and the bed Danny's lying in, sitting in one of those uncomfortable hospital chairs is Steve. His eyes are open and he looks like he hasn't been getting a lot of sleep.

It takes a few moments, but suddenly Steve snaps up, gets to his feet in something that doesn't even resemble gracefulness and steps to Danny's side.

"Hey." His voice is soft, careful. "Are you with me?"

Danny tries to speak, but there's no moisture left in his mouth and everything seems to be stuck together.

Steve leans to the side, taking something from the side table. Danny doesn't see what it is, but a second later he's holding up a cup with a straw to Danny's mouth, helping him up enough to take a sip.

"Thanks." His voice still resembles a croak more than anything, but at least he's getting understandable words out.

Steve nods and leans against the side of the bed. "How're you feeling?"

"Like I've been run over." He closes his eyes and remembers the pure fury that had driven his action, remembers every bite and hit, remembers not feeling any of it. "But I guess that's the best possible outcome."

There's silence from above. He opens his eyes again and sees Steve staring off at some point that Danny can't see from his position, his jaw clenched tightly.

He should say something, but he really just wants to rest, doesn't want any kind of lecture. He fucked up, he knows it.

Doesn't mean he wouldn't act exactly the same again.

Which, come to think of it, is somehow giving him a very strange insight into the McGarrett way of life.

He sighs.

"Just get it out."

Steve looks at him, seems to be trying to look _through_ him.

"I don't even know where to begin, if I'm being honest."

"You could give me a pass, considering all the shit you've pulled over the years."

"That's different!"

Danny raises his brow. "How so?"

Steve opens his mouth, closing it again, looking away with clenched teeth again.

"Danny..."

"What? You're a SEAL, so you're allowed to throw yourself in front of bullets and crazy people? And I'm what, just a cop, just a haole?"

He doesn't know where the anger comes from or how he went from expecting a lecture form Steve to giving one of his own, but he's glad. It's familiar ground, it's far away from having to justify or explain what he did. Because he can't do that, he can't explain it. He's been furious about the whole case, nothing questionable about that, but the pure rage he'd felt, even though he had still been connected to his rational mind terrifies him.

Maybe this whole nightmare is not over yet.

Maybe he's still more animal than man.

He turns his head away.

"I want to sleep."

"Danny-"

"I can't sleep when you keep talking."

Steve's quiet and Danny actually starts to drift.

"It's not because you're a cop." Steve's voice is quiet. Danny wants to turn towards him, but his body feels heavy, as if someone poured lead into it.

"You are an amazing cop, never doubt that. Being a SEAL doesn't make me better. It makes me better trained for some things, but it doesn't make me better." He breathes in deeply. "It's not because you're a haole. You'll never leave Jersey behind, and god, I really don't want you to. You wouldn't be you otherwise. But you're at home here now. You still bitch at the sun and the sand, but you're surfing with us, you've fought to stay here. This is your home now. We're ohana." He clears his throat. "It's not because you're a haole."

There's a pause. It could be a second, could be half an hour.

"Danny?"

Danny doesn't answer, is on the verge to dropping off. Can't get his throat, his tongue and lips to work right.

"It's not because of any of that. It's because it's you. I can't lose you, too, Danny. I really can't."

 

Danny comes awake. It's dark, pitch black and there's the smell of disinfectant, of grief and sickness and death. Danny can't breath and everything hurts.

There's a hollow place under his heart that throbs and burns.

 

 

Danny is released two days later. He didn't tell Steve, but he asked the hospital to run another scan on his blood levels.

Something is wrong. Something is seriously wrong with him.

He's still on bed rest and no matter how much he wants to accept Steve's invitation to stay with him, he goes home. He can't stay close to Steve, when something is so wrong with him, when he might still not be completely over this feral behavior.

He can't stay so close to Steve when his smell alone makes him sway closer.

So instead of falling asleep to one of safest smells he knows he tossed and turned for ages, before finally falling into a fitful sleep.

 

 

Something is poking his side. Danny swats at it, but it doesn't stop.

Grumbling Danny opens his eyes.

It's a branch. It's the fucking branch of a bush.

A bush that he last remembers seeing in Steve's garden. Considering the surroundings it's still in that garden. Along with the house that's standing next to it and the waves crashing on to the small beach that's behind it.

He's at Steve's.

How the hell did he end up here _again_?

Danny gets up and almost falls over again.

He's not on two legs.

He's in his Wolf form.

He lets his head hang down, tries to breathe in, his tongue lolling out and he can feel his saliva drip. It's drip dropping on the ground.

Drip drop. Drip drop.

He tries breathing, he needs to breath, he needs the oxygen. He can't function without oxygen.

But why is he in Steve's garden again? Why does he keep coming here why does he keep shifting without wanting to?

He's losing it. That's the only explanation. He's losing it and he's going to become one of the boogeymen that people tell children about, one of the Wolves that went insane, one of the Wolves that lost all shreds of humanity.

One of the Wolves that goes around and kills people, rips their flesh from their bone and feasts on their flesh and blood, crunches their bones and howls at the moon.

He's a nightmare. He's a nightmare.

He's trapped and he's going insane.

A high whine escapes his throat and he turns away, turns away from the place that smells like sand and sunshine and gunpowder. Of safety and love. He turns away and starts running.

He's running and he just doesn't care anymore where he goes.

 

The sound of cars rushing by is what wakes him the next morning. His head is killing him and his mouth tasted like something died in it.

He snaps his eyes open and sits up, scraps at his mouth, keeps scraping, but no red flakes under his nails.

No blood.

Nothing died.

He didn't kill anyone.

He inhales deeply, holds his breath and breathes out.

Repeats it. And again.

When he can think again he looks around.

The highway is off to his left. He can see it through the crown of trees. How did he get here? He must have run for hours yesterday.

What time is it anyway?

And how is he supposed to get home buck ass naked?

There would be one easy solution to that, but he's not too keen on shifting right now.

Danny takes a moment to orient himself then he starts trotting towards his goal, keeping to the cover of the trees for as long as he can. Only once he can't hide behind them anymore if he still wants to head in his direction, he shifts. It takes him longer than usual, his discomfort blocking him.

But he shifts and then he starts running again.

 

~~*~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank my friend Snaps, also known as secret spy alien centaur agent, for her invaluable help with random facts and tidbits of knowledge, as well as her awesome prank idea :D
> 
> Only one more chapter to go! And then the epilogue :)   
> Considering how long this thing has been on my hard drive without seeing the light of day I'm kinda amazed that it's actually finally uploaded :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, last chapter before the epilogue :)

Danny sits down in front of the door and starts to whine. When that doesn't yield any results, he starts scratching on the door.

"Dammit, what the hell?"

The door is pulled open and Eric appears, his hair sticking up in every direction, his bathrobe askew.

"What the-? Uncle D?"

Danny pushes past him and into the room

 He sits down in the small room that functions as both a kitchen and a living room. Eric just stares at him, closing the door blindly.

Danny yips once.

"What are you doing here? It's way too early."

Danny looks at the clock that's standing atop one of the kitchen cabinet. Six in the morning.

He shrugs, as best as he can in this form.

"Whatever, I'll lie down for another half hour."

Danny moves in front of him.

"What? Uncle D, I'm tired. Please, can I sleep?"

Danny shakes his head and rummages through the room until he discovers the keys to Eric's battered old car.

"You want to drive? Please, be my guest."

Danny rolls his eyes and lies down by the door.

Eric looks heavenward and groans, like the drama queen he is.

"Alright, you despot. I'll get ready and drive you home. But don't you dare get all hussy at my morning routine."

Danny just lets the silence speak for him.

It takes Eric about twenty minutes to get ready. He complains the whole time, but Danny doesn't miss the slight smell of worry that starts wafting through the small flat.

It seems like all he does is cause his family unnecessary worry.

He just hopes all of this is going to be over soon.

"Alright, come on."

Eric opens the door for him and helps him into the car as well. It's a tight fit for Danny on the backseat. It certainly doesn't help that Eric has packed it full with a lot of random bits and bobs and heaps of useless junk.

The drive starts with way too upbeat music blearing through Eric's speakers and Eric going on about a lot of random things that occur to him.

They're about halfway to Danny's flat when he turns down the music.

"So, I know you can't talk right now, unless you want to flash all the other nice drivers on their morning commute, which is why I'll talk now.

"I don't know what's going on with you right now. And I know that I'm just your nephew, but Uncle D, you need to talk to _someone_. We're all worried. And you can bet your a-, you can bet on it that Grandma and mum and Auntie Bridget would be here in a minute if they had any idea what was happening with you.

"So you better be happy that I haven't told them yet, but you better get better soon, or that's going to change."

Danny really wants to answer, but he can't.

Eric's learning way to well how to deal with him.

Eric turns the music back up and starts singing - surprisingly well - along with the songs.

Danny just turns away and hopes he's going to get better, or fake being better well enough, to stop Eric from making good on his promise.

 

 

Eric drops him off at home and heads to the lab. Danny looks around the rooms to figure out if anything has been taken, considering that he didn't lock the door when he left at night.

He's probably lucky that the door wasn't wide open as well.

Nothing seems to be missing, so he gets ready for rhe day. He knows he's technically still on bed rest, but he doesn't think he can sit around at home doing nothing. They might have gotten to Kalima, but there's still a lot left.  Even if all he does is paperwork, he wants _something_ to do.

He's almost ready to leave, just sits on the bed for a moment. Just a second to give his aching body a moment to rest.

Just one moment lying on the soft mattress.

He's going to head out in a moment.

 

Danny wakes up to the ringing of his phone. He fumbles for a moment, until he finds it, lying on the bedside table.

"Williams?"

"Did I wake you?"

Warmth spreads through that throbbing empty space under his heart.

"Of course you didn't wake me, Steven. It's..." He tries to see the time, but his eyes go cross as he tries to look at the screen.  He presses his free hand against his forehead and squeezes his eyes shut.

"No, you didn't wake me."

"Hm. I'll just pretend that I don't hear your slurry speech and actually believe you then, alright?"

"Right."

"I just wanted to tell you that we've got Kalima. Kono got him to confess. He refuses to indulge his supplier, though, so we're going to keep digging."

Danny hums, listening to Steve breathe on the other end of th line. He should be there right now. He shouldn't be sitting at home while the rest of the team works.

"No, no you really should be home."

Danny blinks. Either Steve learned to read thoughts, which would be seriously unsettling, or he must be more out of it than he thought. Which is somewhat unsettling as well.

"Don't tell me you forgot that you went head to head with a manic Wolf two days ago?"

Has it been two days already? Time just seems to swim together for Danny. Like everything else. For example the colors of his room. He's not so sure where his window ends and the wall starts.

This can't be good.

"S'eve?"

Steve stops talking. Only then does Danny realize that he even had been talking.

"Danny? What's wrong?"

"'m not feeling well."

Danny is distantly aware that he's sliding down from his bed. He doesn't feel the impact with the floor though. He only hears the frantic shouting from his phone as he closes his eyes.

He doesn't want Steve to sound so distressed. But he can't help him now. In a minute he'll tell him that he's alright, that he doesn't need to worry. Just a minute, just-

 

Danny barely suppresses a groan as he wakes up. This is becoming way too common.

"I really don't appreciate this role reversal. I was keeping out of hospitals so well."

Steve huffs next to him and tightens the hold he has on Danny's hand.

Huh.

"Trust me, I'd rather not have you here so often either."

Danny looks at him and cringes at the distress he sees. Steve isn't even trying to hide it.

He averts his eyes. He doesn't know how to deal with this.

"Did the doctors find anything?"

"No. Neither now, nor in the blood samples you had them take."

Yeah, and that would be Commander McAngry.

"Why didn't you tell me that something was wrong?"

"Because I didn't know if anything was wrong. That's why I wanted them to run the tests."

"Danny."

Danny groans.

"Because you were already worried enough. Happy?"

Steve glares at him. "No. Absolutely not happy."

Danny stares at the blank wall, trying to swallow the lump that's settling in his throat.

"What now?" He squeezes his eyes shut, hoping to keep the tears from spilling. "Something definitely is wrong. But if the doctors didn't find anything, then-"

"There are more tests. They just did the usual, the preliminary stuff. They're going to figure out what's going on, you hear me? You're going to get better."

He squeezes Danny's hand again and Danny holds on tight, terrified of being swept away otherwise, by the dark thoughts that keep circling through his mind.

 

Danny is so tired. He doesn't quite remember the last time he wasn't tired, but it's all right as long as Steve's by his side. As long as he's there it's okay, it's bearable. But Steve let go of his hand when he left to make a phone call. After that he's in and out of the room. Every time he leaves, Danny has to fight the urge to whine and call him back.

He doesn't.

Of course he doesn't.

Steve comes back from wherever the hell he went off to this time. It took him ages to come back and Danny tries very hard not to be angry, because what right does he have? But he feels betrayed, left behind. He doesn't want to be here, and he certainly doesn't want to be here _alone_.

This time, when Steve comes back, there's someone with him.

"Oh shit."

"Language, Danny."

Danny glares. First at his sister, then at Steve, who's dithering around by the door, looking equal parts smug and out of his depths.

Stella turns to smile at him and Steve relaxes. That's the thing with Stella, she can set everyone at ease.

"I hope I don't seem to be rude, Commander, but could you give me a minute with my brother?"

"Of course. And it's Steve, remember?" He smiles at her and Danny growls. He stops, just a second later, but it's not quick enough.

Steve looks shocked, but Stella frowns.

She turns to him.

"Steve?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry." He looks back at Danny again, before shaking his head and leaving the room, pulling the door closed behind himself.

Stella comes over and leans against the bed.

"Hey."

Danny rolls his eyes, but can't keep from smiling. "Hey yourself."

"I'd say it's nice to see you again, but under the circumstances that would be a lie. I could really do without seeing you laid out in a hospital bed."

"You and me both."

Stella nods, but doesn't say anything else.

"So?"

"So what?"

"You didn't come all the way here just to stare at me. Nothing to say?"

"No, Danny, I came all the way here because my son called me and was so worried he was barely able to talk."

"So you want to lecture me on not upsetting Eric? Trust me, I'd rather not be upsetting him either. But it's not like any of this is my fault."

"Danny, I'm not here to lecture you. I am here because I'm worried about you."

Danny sigs. "Thank you."

"Would you mind telling me what it is that has everyone here being so jumpy in the first place?"

Danny frowns and turns to at her.

"You mean Eric didn't tell you?"

"Didn't I just say that he was too worried to make any sense?"

Danny sighs. He loves his family, he really does, but they're all certainly on the somewhat strange side.

"Well, I got too close to some chemicals and now my Wolf's all out of whack."

"You mean like growling at your sister, because she's nice to your partner?"

Danny cringes. "Yeah, exactly like that."

She hums.

"What else?"

"I'm way more in tune with it. I wake up at night, shifted without remembering doing that. Waking up outside my house, that is." No need telling her where exactly he was waking up. He really could do without that humiliation. "And I-"

He turns away. He really doesn't want to talk about it, not to anyone.

But not talking about it hasn't helped him either.

Doesn't he always lecture Steve on talking about things that bother him?

"When all this started, when I got in contact with those... chemicals, I went feral."

Stella's eyes widen and she slaps her hand over her mouth.

"Danny, did-"

"Nothing happened. Unlike the other victims I was lucky enough that it happened at home and that Eric and Grace where there to calm me down."

She gives his hand a squeeze. She's trembling slightly. Going feral is everyone's nightmare.

He doesn't want to imagine what would have happened, if he'd been out when it happened to him. Or if it'd still been at the beginning of his time in Hawaii, when he didn't have that small pack of three that he has now.

"It's alright, I'm fine."

"You're not, though." She smiles sadly.

Danny closes his eyes. "No, I'm not."

 

 

The doctors decide to keep Danny, even if there's not much they can do or have yet to figure out what is actually wrong with him. But after his two slips they deem it too unsafe to let him go again.

Danny protests at first, but after he slips away during a talk with his doctor and only comes back to himself hours later to the worried faces of Steve and Stella, he stops complaining.

Something is so, so wrong with him.

Danny is not someone who thinks about the best possible outcome. Instead he thinks about the worst.

And with whatever is going on with him, there are a _lot_ of possible worst outcomes.

By day four Danny sleeps more hours then he's awake and is barely able to move whenever he is awake.

He's too tired to feel terrified. He knows he's afraid, but it feels like a distant echo.

Steve is with him as much as he can, but they've got a new lead on the case a connection to Stacy Henshaw, the two-timer. Steve and the rest of the team need to keep working the case. As much as Danny can see that it pains Steve to leave every time, crime doesn't stop for sickness.

And there's nothing that Steve can do to help him.

Danny hurts to see him leave, but on the other hand he's glad that he goes. Seeing his face barely able to conceal the worry, the slowly growing despair with every test that comes back negative, makes Danny want to curl up around him and hide them both away, make all the pain on Steve's face go away.

He gets visits, from everyone on the team, whenever they can, gets visits from Rachel, and Stan. Grace, trying to be strong and ignoring the tears that run down her face and Eric openly crying.

On day nine his parents come out to Hawaii.

"Mom." His voice is thin, raspy. "Pops."

She smiles. It's a wobbly and thin thing, but she tries and leans over, kissing his forehead.  His pops grips his hand tightly, doesn't let go, even when Danny doesn't have the strength to grip back.

"'m sorry."

"Don't be, honey. It's not your fault."

He knows that. Of course he does, but it doesn't help. He's still hurting the people he cares about.

He just wants it to be over.

 

#

 

Danny wakes up. He doesn't know what time it is. He blinks, but his eyes are gritty. His arm doesn't move when he tries to rub at them.

Something moves to his right and a moment later there's a straw pressed to his lips. He takes a sip and he's parched. He drinks more, but the straw is taken away too soon. He's still thirsty, he needs more water, he's going to die of thirst.

"Easy, you're going to make yourself sick."

Danny doesn't know the voice and he blinks again, tries to get his surroundings into focus.

A woman is sitting next to his bed. Her hair is thick, dark waves, gray locks running through it. Her dark eyes and her cheekbones remind him of someone, but he can't place her face.

Has he seen her before?

Who is she? And why's she here? She's no doctor, no nurse.

And where are the others? Why's no one with her?

"Detective Williams, my name is Makani Kelly."

Ah. The cheekbones.

"I'm Chin Ho's aunt and he asked me to come see you."

"Wh-" Danny swallows, coughs and tries again. "Why?"

"Because he's worried."

Danny hopes he can convey the _No shit_ without saying anything. Talking is a bit hard and he doesn't want to waste precious words on something that's so painfully obvious.

"I'm somewhat of an expert in Werewolf-Questions."

Danny frowns and sniffs, but his senses are dulled and the smell of disinfectant is hiding anything else.

"Yes, I'm a Wolf. I've also been working in Lykantropology for a very long time."

Danny huffs, which is close enough for a laugh right now. "No disrespect to you, or Chin, but the doctors haven't been able to help me. And I'm not the first Wolf they've treated." He coughs again, swallows convulsively. After a deep breath he continues. "What good is a deep knowledge of our traditions and how we started cohabiting with regular humans going to help me?"

"You might be surprised."

Danny closes his eyes. "God, I hope I will be."

 

Danny wakes up. It's darker than before in his room. Makani isn't there anymore, but someone else sits in the seat next to him. Danny takes a deep breath and suddenly his senses are filled with the smell of Steve, his exhaustion, his sweat. There's the sound of people walking down the floor, soft words spoken somewhere outside.

Danny turns his head slightly, watching the slumped over figure next to the bed.

Steve looks like shit, and yet, Danny is incredibly happy to see him. He might be a bit melodramatic, but it's as if he's able to breath fully for the first time in days.

And fuck it, he's been stuck in a hospital bed for who knows how long, is sick without anyone knowing what's actually wrong with him, so he feels like he's owed the right to be somewhat melodramatic.

Not like there's anyone here that could get on his case about it, anyway.

But he's digressing.

There was a point he was getting at. Maybe. Or maybe he's just rambling. In his head.

God dammit, it's high time he gets back on his feet again. He really doesn't want to stay alone with his thoughts any more.

 

Danny wakes up. Stella and his mom are standing by the door, talking quietly with someone.

"Mom?"

 Her head snaps around and she hurries over to him, holding the straw to his lips. He blinks at her. "When'd you get to Hawaii?"

 

Danny wakes up.

He can smell Steve and Kono in his room. Steve grips Danny's hand.

"Kalima's daughter?"

Kono hums. "Changed her name and face, which is why we didn't see the connection sooner."

Steve sighs, wipes his thumb over Danny's palm once more, before he stands up, letting go of it.

"Let's bring her in."

 

Danny wakes up.

Grace is draped somewhere at the height of his hips, her hand clutching his fingers, carefully out of the way of an IV line. Rachel is sitting in the other chair - when did a second chair appear in his room? - her eyes are wide and she smiles when she sees him watching her, but it's trembling.

"Oh Daniel."

He wants to cry, but there are no tears. He doesn't want to put her through this, put Grace through it or his family, both by blood and by choice.

He's so sorry, so sorry.

 

Danny wakes up.

There's a woman with dark hair and gray locks leaning over him. Her cheekbones are high and sharp.

"Detective Williams?"

"Hm?"

He blinks. He can smell Steve in his room, but he's not there.

"S'eve?"

"Commander McGarrett just stepped outside to get something to eat. He was at risk of being thrown out otherwise."

Danny smiles and looks back at her.

"Makani, right? Chin's aunt?"

She quirks an eyebrow. "That's right. Glad you remembered me this time."

She turns her gaze to the door, frowning, before she turns back to him.

"How are you feeling?"

He shrugs. Though it's more of a twitch, to be perfectly honest.

"Tired. Heavy. Confused." He bites his lip, looks away. "Scared."

"Understandable. Although-"

He turns to look at her when she doesn't continue.

"Although what?"

She shakes her head. "Just a thought."

He glares at her. He really doesn't need this vague bullshit right now. Before he can point that out to her though, she starts talking again.

"While I have you lucid for the moment, I'd like to ask you a few questions."

"Be my guest."

"I talked to your team and your pack. We're all pretty sure that all this started when you came into contact with the tampered drugs to suppress your moon-shift."

Danny nods. He'd come up with the same. Not that it was a far leap, considering that was the only thing that was seriously off about the time before he got sick.

"Something struck me as very strange, when they described your behavior that day." She looks at him. "When you went feral, you displayed aggression towards the police and your team. Not surprising, as they were getting close to your home, your territory.

"Also not surprising is you letting your daughter and nephew close, as your Wolf recognized them as pack. Having them close and safe helped you."

He nods. Nothing new. Again. He was really hoping that she would have answers. Instead she's just reciting obvious thoughts and facts.

It's disheartening.

"Detective Williams."

His eyes snap open at the sharpness of her voice. He hadn't realized that they'd slid shut. Shit. It's getting harder to think again.

"Hm. Let me test something."

She walks towards the door and talks to someone. When Danny opens his eyes again, Steve's back in the room.

Danny smiles when he sees him, breathes his scent in.

"Steve."

"Hey, how are you feeling?" He steps closer to the bed, his hand circling around Danny's wrist. Tension bleeds out from Danny's body and the thing in his ribcage stops eating itself.

"Better."

Steve frowns at him.

"Seriously. I'm not good, but I'm better. I'm talking aren't I?"

Steve smiles and Danny soaks the sight up, warming from the inside.

"That you are."

Makani steps closer. Danny's almost forgotten she's there.

"Commander?"

Steve cocks his head, but doesn't turn away from Danny.

"Yes?"

"Could you give me another minute with the detective?"

Steve's hand twitches and his grip tightens.

"Do I need to leave?"

"The things I have to ask him might be very personal."

Steve nods, but panic surges through Danny. He can't leave.

"No!"

Steve looks down at him.

"No, stay, please."

Steve frowns, but the hand on Danny's wrist settles again.

"You sure?"

"Yes. Please, don't go."

Steve smiles, but it looks sad. "Alright."

He sits down on the mattress.

Makani hesitates, before nodding and stepping closer.

"Commander, I expect that you are not going to hold anything you learn against Detective Williams."

Danny snorts at the indignant look on Steve's face. "Of course not!"

She eyes him for a moment longer, before nodding and turning back towards Danny.

"I'm not entirely sure, at which point in our conversation you drifted off earlier."

Danny frowns and tries to remember their conversation. He knows he'd been frustrated that she had nothing new, nothing he didn't already know, or had at least guessed.

"The day I went feral. You were talking about how having my pack close by calmed me down."

Unlike most of the other Wolves. For all that was happening now he had been damn lucky. He hadn't hurt anyone, much less killed them.

He doesn't want to think about what that'd do to someone. Waking up and learning of what you'd done.

"That's right. But there was something that didn't quite fit in, right?"

Danny blinks hat her, not sure what she's getting at.

"Detective Williams, who do you count into your Wolf Pack?"

"In general it's a pretty big pack. My parents and siblings, most of my cousins, aunts and uncles, nephews and nieces my daughter. But out here?" He shrugs. "Out here it's just me, my daughter and nephew."

She looks at him, as if she's waiting for something else. He tries to think of something he's missed, but his thoughts are sluggish. He frowns. What is she getting at?

His eyes widen and he snaps his gaze towards Steve, then back to her.

"No."

"It's the only explanation that makes sense."

"No, it doesn't, it absolutely doesn't make an ounce of sense!" He tries to sit up, struggles, but he can't do this lying down. His limbs barely cooperate and Steve rushes forward, trying to help him.

Danny flinches back.

"Don't!"

Time stops. Well, it probably doesn't, but it feels like it. Steve freezes, looking at him with something very close to hurt in his eyes, pulling back, both physical and mentally.

Danny wants to make that look go away, but he doesn't know how, wants to calm him down, but he's not calm himself.

He yearns for Steve to touch him again, to feel that warmth and calm again, but he can't, not now, not after what Makani is saying.

"How can that... It's not possible. I mean, I would _know_."

She shakes her head. "Maybe not. Yes, usually you'd know, of course you'd know. But we know pretty little about Feral Behavior. Most of our knowledge is based on old stories and legends. What we do know for sure though is that your Wolf side is so much closer to the surface than at any other time. You're basically functioning on instinct and instinct alone."

"So what? That doesn't-" He wants to say it's not enough that there's so much more to it.

But is there?

"Does anyone want to clue me in to what you are talking about? Especially as it seems to be involving me?" Steve sounds annoyed, pissed at being left out, of people talking circles around him. But Danny knows him, knows that he's still hurt about the rejection, worried about Danny, wishing he knew what the problem is, so that he could make that problem go away. Danny can hear it, see it. Because he knows Steve.

And isn't that part of the problem?

He sighs, closes his eyes and lies back down against the pillows.

"Detective?"

He'd wave his hand at her, if he could. As it is, he makes do with a twitch.

"Go ahead. He's right, it's involving him as well." He sighs. "More than you think though, probably."

There's a moment of silence, but Danny doesn't open his eyes to look at either of them.

He's just so tired.

"I can't be sure, obviously, but all things considered, it's a pretty educated guess."

Danny imagines Steve's 'get on with it' look.

"I think that Detective Williams has bonded with you."

Danny does open his eyes when there's no reaction to this from Steve's side. At least no reaction that he's able to hear.

Steve stares at Makani, not blinking, his face betraying nothing. He turns his head slightly, looking down at Danny.

"Uhm. What?"

Danny sighs. He can't blame Steve for the confusion. Danny himself isn't entirely sold on the idea either and he is the one actually experiencing everything that would make sense, if he had bonded.

He shrugs.

"But... How does that... why..."

Danny wants to take Steve's hand, to have that point of contact, but he's not sure how well received his touch would be right now.

"Steve, it wasn't on purpose. Please, I wouldn't-"

"I know. I know that Danny, but how... why..."

"My guess is as good as yours. But, even all this Wolf's business aside, we have a pretty strong bond."

They've been partners and friends for years, knowing each other inside out, going through trial and imminent death time and again. Not to mention that Danny cares about him in more capacity than as a friend. Sometimes he thinks that it's the same for Steve, but then he realizes that it might just be the way Steve works.

"We have, but, I didn't know that there could be... accidental bonds."

"You and me both, babe." Danny winces. "I've never heard of it before, but considering how close we already are and, as Makani says, considering that rational thinking or human viewpoints are pretty much non-existent in a Feral State, my Wolf Mind probably just latched onto you in a situation that didn't make any sense and was incredibly volatile." He turns his head away, looking at the wall. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." Steve shakes his head. "As you said, you didn't do it on purpose, so nothing to worry about."

Danny snorts. "Yeah, except for the fact that I'm bed-ridden and that I can barely move, let alone talk or think when you're not around."

Steve grimaces and nods.

"Yeah, there's that." He looks at Makani, then back at Danny. "So, what now?"

"That would be up to the detective."

Steve looks at him. "How?"

Danny groans and thumps his head against the pillow.

"Now that I am actually aware of all this being possibly due to a bond, I can actually do something about it. It's not as if I'm still driven by instinct." He glances at Steve. "Well, it's probably more correct to say that now that we are aware of it _we_ can do something about it."

"We?"

Makani stands up. "I don't think I should be here for this conversation. If you need me, I'll be in the cafeteria."

Steve's gaze trails after her, before snapping back to Danny. "What do you mean 'we can do something about this'?"

"As much as this is mostly in my head or my hormones or whatever, it's still something that involves the two of us. And me just wishing the bond away doesn't work. One way to get rid of it would be separation for a long time. But even if there wasn't the fact that we work together, you're my best friend and I'm really not keen on not seeing you or hearing from you for months on end, possibly even years." Steve shakes his head, a protest already forming, but Danny doesn't let him talk. "Especially since there is a way that doesn't involve that."

Steve cocks his head, something like hope in his eyes. Danny isn't surprised that he doesn't want the separation, but it still warms him to see it. "The thing is, once a bond is formed it needs some kind of end signal so that I can start to severe it. One way would be the prolonged separation. No contact is a pretty good indicator that things have ended."

"And the other way?"

"Well, death would work as well."

Steve rears back, his face draining of color.

"Sorry, sorry, no there's still another way. I'm sorry Steve, that was maybe not all that called for."

"Damn right it wasn't." He glares at Danny, his Aneurysm Face still firmly in place, but his grip on Danny's wrist no less strong. "So? The other way? That doesn't involve death or injury?"

Well, at least it won't be involving physical injury. And none at all for Steve.

"You reject me."

Steve blinks. "What?"

"You tell me very clearly, that you are not interested in me or the bond. You reject me in a way that doesn't leave any kind of doubt. That way I have a clear signal that the bond is not working and that it's not going anywhere, so I'll be able to severe it."

Steve frowns, looking away. Danny's not sure what he's thinking about, but he's willing to give him time to do it. He did get quite a lot dumped on him at once.

"But what if I don't want to?"

"What?"

Steve looks up, straight at Danny. Holding his gaze. He's determined. Danny sees that face whenever they're on a case and  Steve thinks he's got it all figured out and knows what they need to do and doesn't want to let anyone talk him out of it. Daring someone to disagree so that he can bring up all the reasons he's formed as to why exactly they need to do it exactly the way he's planned it.

"What if I don't want to reject you? If I don't want to reject the bond?"

Danny's heart speeds up and that space behind his ribcage, the one that he now knows is the bond, is filled with warmth. If Steve keeps this up rejection won't work, it'll have to be separation.

"What are you talking about? Do you have any idea what you're talking about?"

Steve just lifts his chin, staring Danny down.

"This isn't the kind of bond that pack mates have, this isn't some kind of platonic bond. Don't you get it, Steve? This bond didn't just form because we're so close. This bond formed because we are so close and because I care about you!" He's yelling and part of him is amazed that he has the energy to get so loud. Another part tells him that he needs to calm the hell down. But the biggest part, by far is screaming at him to make Steve shut up, because how is he supposed to get past this?

"And you think I don't care about you?"

"Of course you care, but that's not what I'm talking about!" He's making him spell it out and he really doesn't want to, he doesn't want to acknowledge it any further than he already has, but of course Steve McGarrett needs this shit to be spelled out again.

He closes his eyes, the sudden rush of energy leaving him again. It's not the tiredness he's experienced in the last days. It's a deep weariness, born from emotional turmoil.

"You're my best friend. But that's not all I'm feeling, Steve. I don't know when it started, but I fell for you a long time ago. I know there was a time that I didn't feel like this, but I can barely remember how that felt."

He looks at Steve, wants to see his reaction. Wants to see the rejection, so that he can finally put an end to this whole ordeal.

But he doesn't. Instead he sees Steve smile. A warm, happy, radiant smile, that takes Danny's breath away.

"See? It would really be a bad idea to break off the bond."

"What?"

Steve snorts, his hand griping Danny's tightly.

"Considering how often you tell me that I am emotionally constipated, it's quite the role reversal, isn't it?"

"Uhm... what?"

Steve lets go of his hand, but only to sit down on the mattress and cup Danny's face.

"You're an idiot. I'm in love with you. Have been for a long time."

Danny gasps, as the warmth from behind his ribcage expands, flooding his whole body. He's left blinking, unable to form words. Steve's smile fades away and he starts to pull back.

"Danny?"

"Sorry, wait." He grips Steve's shirt, not wanting to let him go. "Gimme, just give me a minute."

Steve nods, his expression clearing, but still worried.

After a few more moments it's over, though the feeling of warmth and contentedness stays.

He smiles, feels the tiredness that was left slowly receding. Can finally see and smell and hear and feel just like always. Maybe even clearer. Or maybe that's just Steve.

The Wolf inside him settles down.

"What're you waiting for, you lug, come down here."

He pulls Steve down, silencing his protest that he was just doing what Danny was telling him. Kisses him.

And finally, finally, the world aligns itself again.

 

~~END~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *psst* Don't run off with the 'END' thing - remember, there's still a short epilogue coming your way :D
> 
> Thank you for reading and commenting and liking the story so far :)


	5. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that this took me so long. I was in a bit of a slump and no matter how often I started the editing it just... wasn't happening...  
> Also, if you find any errors, especially with tense, please let me know! I wrote the whole thing in the wrong tense and I suck at English tense, so while I hope I got all the mistakes, there might still be some left. 
> 
> But now it's done! Hope you'll enjoy it :)

Epilogue

 

The office is almost silent, Kono and Chin running down some leads, Lou away on a short trip with his family. The only sounds are the ticking of a clock and the muffled sound of traffic through the window.

And, of course, the slight creaking noise of his office chair. He hadn't even been aware that it creaked, not until now, with everyone else away and himself unable to sit still, staring through the wall of glass. Not that he is seeing much. He shudders, crosses his arms to keep from hugging himself.

Even without the others around, you never know when they will return or if someone else will drop by. And he's inside an office surrounded by glass. He doesn't need anyone seeing him hugging himself, lest they decide it's better to send him home again. It's his first day back after his medical leave, but Steve has refused to let him do anything but desk work for at least two more days already. He really doesn't want anyone to think he can't handle even that.

With the bond now acknowledged by both of them he's had no more blackouts and feels way more stable, even compared to before the unfinished bond had dragged him down.

That doesn't mean he's all well and dandy though.

And last night has just been one more sign of that.

Danny shudders and gets up, pacing up and down.

Steve had gotten a call at some god-awful time in the morning, almost night. He'd shushed Danny when he'd blearily tried to get up as well and gone off to the crime scene, leaving Danny to catch a few more hours of sleep, before heading into the office.

It had not been a good idea.

He'd had trouble sleeping the whole night, but after Steve had left, the vague unease had turned into a barrage of sensations and images that make him nauseous just thinking about, even hours after getting up and leaving the house.

Danny sighs and scrubs both hands over his face.

His hands are shaking.

Three more days until the full moon. Danny doesn't want to think about it. He wishes he could just - not shift. But the doctors all agree that he should ride this shift out instead of taking his suppressants. They don't want to risk a negative reaction, even if the chemicals of the tempered suppressants have long since left his body.

They're mostly concerned about the effect not shifting might have on his body after his last botched shift, but Danny can't help but worry about going Feral again, both in reaction to taking suppressants or letting the shift run its natural course.

Both options terrify him.

Danny has avoided shifting as much as he could since he got out of the hospital, but the combined forces of Stella, Makani, Steve and the therapist he'd started talking to, had convinced him to do it. Of his own free will. To take back control over his shift, about what is as much a part of himself as his human side.

And he'd done it and it was alright. Almost good even.

The full moon is a different story though.

As much as he keeps his mind with his other shifts, during the moon shift he'll mostly fall back on instinct and subconsciousness. Theoretically he will be no more dangerous than a trained pet dog.

But he wouldn't be in his normal rational mind.

He wouldn't entirely be _him_.

And that terrifies him.

Just one of the many things that kept him awake at the moment.

Seriously, if the sound of waves crashing on the shore isn't the worst of it, then there's obviously something very wrong.

He has to admit though, ocean waves or not, he's sleeping so much better when he's at Steve's place. He'd tried for some distance after he'd been released from the hospital. Not distancing himself entirely from Steve, because that was absolutely not what he wanted. Just. Not crowding either. Even if their bond was now acknowledged and therefore stable, it didn't mean he had permission to just stay over all the time.

Steve had called him an idiot when he'd finally gotten him to voice his worries - loudly and only realizing what Steve had goaded him into admitting after it was out - and that was that. Since then he's sleeping at Steve's more often than not. And no longer on the couch, but actually beside him.

And for all Danny's worries and fears, with the smell and warmth of Steve surrounding him, he feels safe when he falls asleep.

If only it would keep the nightmares at bay.

But the world is not always sunshine and rainbows and even if bonding is a balm for his soul and makes him feel complete in a way he's never before experienced - it's no miraculous cure. It will take more than that to loose his fear and distrust of himself.

Thus, therapy. He has to confront his fears.

Danny straightens, before grabbing his things and heading out. This is most likely not what his therapist has meant, but he doesn't care.

If he wants to move on he needs to know _why_. Needs to hear it himself. Needs to see the woman who'd brought about this nightmare.

 

#

 

Danny stays in front of the door, breathing in. The guards have already lead her in. Stacy Henshaw, Anastasia Kalima. Whatever she goes by now. She's sitting in front of the metal table, her hands cuffed to its top. Her brown hair is messy, and her skin seems almost pallid against the garish orange of her clothes. Her fists are clenched so hard her knuckles are starting to turn white and her lips pressed in a flat line. Her glare keeps flickering towards the door and away again.

She can't see him, he knows that. Just as well as he knows that she's not dangerous in a physical sense. But when he looks at her, his heart lodges in his throat.

He's never really seen her, aside from some pictures or from far through Steve's glass paneled office. He didn't have any interaction with her.

But she's the one behind all these deaths. Behind Werewolves going feral and killing people. Behind his own madness that could have ended so much worse so easily. If his pack hadn't been there... Or if his madness had gone deeper and he wouldn't have recognized them as pack... It's a thought that haunts his nightmares and often enough his waking hours.

She's made Wolves like monsters. As if there weren't enough people holding unfounded prejudice against his kind.

Now he can barely defend his Wolf nature against _himself_.

He closes his eyes, breathing in. He doesn't know what he hopes will happen. But he hopes for _something_.

Squaring his shoulders he pushes down the doorhandle, striding in.

Her gaze flickers up to him and over him, cataloging every little detail. She cocks her head but doesn't say anything.

Danny slides into the chair in front of her, noting the dark rings under her eyes, greasiness of her hair, the light tremble of her left fist.

And still she holds herself as if she's above everyone else.

"Ms Kalima."

"I prefer Henshaw."

Danny shrugs. "Then you should have probably gone about the name change in a more official manner."

She frowns, before straightening in her seat.

"You seem to have me at a disadvantage, Mr-?"

"Detective. Detective Williams."

"Well, Detective, now that we've gotten acquainted with each other, I feel we're close enough for you to tell me, to what I owe the dubious honor of your visit." Her gaze falls to the tabletop between them before looking back up again. "Considering you have no case files with you I'm somewhat doubting you're here on a follow up." She smirks. "Besides, I was very much under the impression that Commander McGarrett was handling the case." Her voice has a note that might almost be called purring.

Danny has a hard time reigning in his instinct to flash his teeth at her.

Instead he decides to ignore it.

"I am actually here about your case. Though not quite in an official capacity." He smirks back at her, this time flashing teeth.

Kalima twitches and leans back, trying to sprawl in a relaxed manner.

Her shoulders are too tight to sell it.

"Then what do you want?"

Danny looks at her. He hasn't come here with a brilliant game plan in mind. Or with any plan, really. He just wants to know. Wants to see her when she tells him.

Some black lines on white paper are not enough.

"Why?"

She raises her eyebrows, her shoulders loosening.

"Take a look into your files, Detective. I already told the Commander and that pretty Lieutenant."

"Ah yes, woe is me, life isn't fair. Was that it?"

She snarls, her hands hitting the table top with a loud clank.

Danny leans forward, resting his elbows on the table. "Something wrong?"

"You sit there in your comfortable seat, never having to fear what being a Wolf would do to you and your life. Everything nice and comfortable, right?" She glares at him. "My mum lost everything. They fired her because she couldn't work around full moon. The Government pretends that we're all the same, that they protect from prejudice in the work field, but some get suppressants shoved up their asses, but when someone is fired because of a flimsy excuse no one lifts a hand. No one!"

She's breathing hard, her hair in even more disarray, staring down at Danny with pure hatred in her eyes.

Danny isn't blind. He knows that employers pull shit like this all the time. Wolves have been fighting for more protection in the working field for years and years.

It was horrible and he wished nothing more than for it to change.

But nothing about that explained how it would excuse, or even just explain the insanity that Kalima had unleashed.

Danny tries and fails to suppress a growl t in his voice. "And that excuses people dying?"

Kalima snorts and leans back in her chair again. "Those were hardly my fault."

"Hardly your-" Now it's Danny leaning into her space. His  teeth slightly elongated, a deep growl reverberating through the room. "You forced people into feral states. Even if you were dumb enough not to know it before you first started this, you certainly knew it by the second time!" Danny can feel his fingertips shifting, his nails getting longer and harder, digging into the table. "Don't give me that shit, you didn't care, you didn't care about anyone or anything besides your own demented desire for some some twisted revenge. These people you killed they were good people, they had friends and family. Hell, many of them made helping people their job!

"And you just decided to... you..."

Danny stares at her. He'd love to do more, to shake her, to shout, to just hurt and rip.

But he doesn't. Because he's not an animal, no matter what she did to him. To so many others.

She's destroyed lives and families. Not only the Wolves, but her father's, making him feel guilty enough to join her madness, playing her boyfriends to get rid of loose ends without getting her own hands dirty.

She's destroyed so much and still she sits there like she's done no evil, angry at the world for acting as if she were a villain.

But she is. She tried to make monsters out of Wolves and instead became one herself.

Danny takes a deep breath leaning back, turning around and leaving without another word.

He doesn't know what he'd hoped to find here.

Whatever it was, he didn't get it.

"Danno?"

Danny looks up at the soft voice. Steve is standing on the opposite wall but coming closer now. He reaches out, circling Danny's wrist.

The contact calms him and he lets himself be dragged closer. 

"Are you alright?"

No he's not. But he's not alone either.

"I will be." He allows Steve to pull him out of the prison and into the Hawaiian sun.

 

<<<<The End>>>> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thank you to everyone who's read, kudosed, bookmarked and commented on this fic :)


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